Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.0)

This graph is give information about the number of job in foue parts of the economy in the US between 1960 to 2020.

The number of jobs in four parts sector of economy in the us, [redacted phone].

in this graph the different lines show a different job. This graph start with years [redacted phone].onthe other hand the jobs in millions of dejits 0 to 25. The first line start between 0 and 5 this line show healthcare after 1960 healthcare job was increasis in 1980 the healthcare job was incresis and touch the dijit of 5 and next years was most increasis on the 11 millions in 2000.Last final stage according this graph in 2020 the healthcare jobs was more increasis and on 16 millions.

second sector describe agriculture job in 1960 have 6 mollion start and increasis next years and towipe abour 10 in millions increasis in 1980. After this 1980 wipeup job increasis and the stage on 15 mollions in 2020. After 2020 job has not very increasis as compare previous years only imcreasis 2 mollions in 20 years.

Next stage discribe the reatil

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response identifies several relevant figures, including healthcare rising from about 2 million jobs in 1960 to 16 million in 2020, and agriculture beginning at around 6 million. However, key trends are repeatedly assigned to the wrong sector: the rise from 6 to 10 and then 15–16 million describes retail, not agriculture, while agriculture declined overall. Manufacturing is not discussed, and the response ends mid-sentence after “Next stage discribe the reatil,” so the main features are not adequately summarised. There is also no clear overview comparing the sectors or identifying the broad changes. To improve, give an accurate overview first, then report the main trends for all four sectors using a few supporting figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the report by moving from healthcare to another sector, with sequence markers such as “first,” “second,” and “Next stage.” This gives the reader some sense of order. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the sector labels and trends become confused, and the final paragraph is unfinished. Several sentences run together, for example the description beginning “the first line start between 0 and 5,” while repeated references to “this graph” do not clearly connect ideas. Use separate paragraphs for an overview and the main comparisons, and make each paragraph focus on correctly identified sectors. Clear sentence boundaries and more precise referencing would make the information easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some task-related vocabulary, including “jobs,” “sector,” “healthcare,” “agriculture,” and “millions,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and many word choices or spellings make the report hard to interpret, such as “dejits,” “mollion,” “wipeup,” and “incresis.” Phrases such as “the jobs in millions of dejits” and “the stage on 15 mollions” are not natural ways to describe a graph. Aim to use a small set of accurate reporting expressions consistently, such as “rose to,” “fell to,” “remained stable,” and “stood at.” Check spelling and use the correct sector name for each trend.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The writer attempts to describe changes over time and uses some longer sentences, but grammatical control is weak and sentence patterns are repetitive. Errors in verb forms and agreement appear in phrases such as “This graph is give information,” “healthcare job was increasis,” and “the healthcare jobs was more increasis.” Articles, plurals, and prepositions are also often missing or inaccurate, as in “number of job in foue parts” and “between 1960 to 2020.” Punctuation and capitalisation are inconsistent, with several ideas joined together without clear sentence boundaries. Practise accurate simple past forms and basic sentence patterns first, then combine related information with “while” or “whereas” only when the clauses are complete.

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