Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors-manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare- of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020. The data is presented in millions.

Overall, number of jobs in retail and healthcare sectors increased steadly throughout the period.In contrast number of jobs in agriculture and manufacturing sectors decreased consequently. Interestingly, agriculture sector jobs were lowest among all during the given period.

Jobs in healthcare sector increased from around 2 millions in 1960 to approximately at 11 million,before reaching to the peak roughly at 16 million in 2020. Similarly, number of jobs in retail sector increased from around 6 million in 1960 to roughly at 16 million in 2020.

In contrast, agriculture sector jobs fall from around 6 million in 1960 to around 1 million in 2020, which is the lowest number among all. However, number of jobs in manufacturing sector intially increased from 15 million in 1960 to 20 million in 1980, before falling to around 13 million at the end of the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You provide a clear overview of the main contrasts: retail and healthcare rise, while agriculture is the smallest sector, and manufacturing peaks before declining. The body supports this with relevant figures, including manufacturing’s rise from 15 million to 20 million and its fall to 13 million, and healthcare’s growth to about 16 million. Most reporting matches the graph. However, the overview says manufacturing decreased throughout, which conflicts with its initial rise, and agriculture falls to about 2 million in 2020 rather than 1 million. Also, healthcare reaches about 11 million in 2000 before rising to 16 million, so describing 11 million as a stage before the peak would be clearer. Overall, the key features are selected and supported, though a few details are over-generalised or imprecise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response is organised in a clear sequence: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs comparing the rising sectors with the declining or fluctuating ones. This gives the reader a logical progression through the data. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “In contrast,” “Similarly,” and “However” help signal relationships between trends. The comparisons are generally easy to follow, especially the separate discussion of healthcare and retail followed by agriculture and manufacturing. Some cohesion is less controlled: “In contrast” introduces manufacturing even though it first rises, and the overview’s claim that both manufacturing and agriculture decrease does not align with the later account. More precise links and consistent descriptions of each trend would make the progression even smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use a suitable range of task vocabulary, including “increased,” “falling,” “peak,” “sector,” and “approximately,” and the meaning remains clear. There is some flexibility in describing different patterns, particularly the manufacturing rise and subsequent fall. However, several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive: “decreased consequently” does not express the intended contrast, and “reaching to the peak” is not natural phrasing. Spelling slips such as “steadly” and “intially” also reduce precision. At this level, the vocabulary is adequate and includes attempts at more specific language, but greater accuracy and more natural collocations are needed to show the flexibility expected at the next level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses with “before” and “which,” and the main trends are generally understandable. Some grammatical errors remain. For example, “Overall, number of jobs” needs an article, while “2 millions” should be “2 million.” In “increased from around 2 millions … before reaching to,” the number form and verb pattern are inaccurate; “increased from around 2 million, then reached” would be clearer. There are also punctuation and spacing problems, such as missing spaces after full stops and commas. These errors rarely prevent understanding, but they show that control is not yet consistent. Check articles, plural forms after numbers, and sentence punctuation during revision.

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