Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graphe illustrates the details regarding the number of jobs in fmanufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare, sectores of united states of america from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the retail and healthcare sectors remained most popular and spiked significantly. While the manufacturing witnessed a light raise and after that it decreased 7 percent in 2020. but the agriculture slightly go down and remained constant till 2000 and ended with a little declind in 2020.

Two of the sectors healthcare and retail surprisingly soar every year and ended by 16 percent in 2020. Whereas manufacturing started by 15 percent in the start and went upward by 20 in 1980 neverthless it came down by 13 percent in 2020.

similarly, agriluture sector of us economy incepted by 6 percent in 1960 and seemingly it dropped by 3 percent in 1980 and remained cinstant till 2000.In 2020 there was a marginaly drop in agriculture department

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and describe several key trends, including manufacturing peaking in 1980 and then declining, and agriculture falling before remaining stable. However, some important comparisons are unclear or inaccurate. The overview says retail and healthcare “remained most popular,” although both began well below manufacturing; they only reached the joint highest level by 2020. You also describe retail and healthcare as rising “every year,” but the chart gives values only at four points, so this claim is not supported. The manufacturing fall from 20 to 13 is seven million jobs, not seven percent, and the final agriculture figure of about two million is omitted. Select the main comparisons more precisely and report units consistently.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs describing the sectors. This gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, progression is weakened by unclear or repetitive connections. The overview and the later paragraph both discuss manufacturing, while the final paragraph returns to agriculture without a clear link to the preceding comparison. Connectors such as “While,” “Whereas,” and “similarly” are not always used to show the relationship between complete ideas, and the sentence beginning “but the agriculture” is awkwardly attached to the overview. Grouping the two rising sectors together and then comparing them with manufacturing and agriculture would make the organisation more logical and cohesive.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “spiked,” “dropped,” “remained constant,” and “marginally.” However, inaccurate word choice, spelling, and collocation are frequent enough to make parts of the report difficult to read. Examples include “graphe,” “fmanufacturing,” “sectors,” “declind,” “agriluture,” and “cinstant.” Some expressions are also unsuitable for this chart: “most popular” suggests preference, and “percent” mislabels the figures, which represent jobs in millions. Use standard chart language and check spelling carefully. More precise choices such as “employment,” “rose,” “fell,” and “levelled off” would help you describe the data clearly and consistently.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast with “While” and a sentence beginning “Whereas.” However, control is inconsistent, and several sentence structures are faulty. For example, “While the manufacturing witnessed a light raise and after that it decreased…” is not a complete, well-formed contrast, and “but the agriculture slightly go down” has an incorrect verb form and sentence connection. The final sentence also lacks a clear full stop before “In 2020,” while capitalisation after a full stop is inconsistent elsewhere. Practise forming complete sentences with consistent past-tense verbs, and use linking clauses only when both sides of the contrast are grammatically complete.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.