Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates the quantity of jobs, measured in millions, in four fields of the economy in the US from the year 1960 to 2020.

Overall, opportunity trends in retail and healthcare have grown significantly over the years. Manufacturing have observed both rise and fall, while agriculture kept on declining throughout the years.

In 1960, manufacturing was the most promising sector for opportunities with 15 million jobs, and the growth accelerated to 20 million in the year 1980. However, in the year 2000, it observed a moderate decline with around 17 million jobs, and the downfall kept on going, and reached less than 15 million jobs in 2020. On the contrary, retail kept growing starting from around only 6 million jobs in 1960, which rose to 10 million, 15 million, and finally around 16 million, in the years 1980, 2000, and 2020, respectively. The same trend can be observed in healthcare, which started with around 3 million jobs in 1960, and reached a peak of around 16 million in the year 2020. Agriculture on the other hand has experienced only decline, starting from around 6 million jobs in 1960 to around only 2 million jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response selects the main trends and supports them with relevant figures: manufacturing peaks at 20 million in 1980 before falling, retail rises to about 16 million, and agriculture declines from 6 to 2 million. The overview also identifies the contrasting growth in retail and healthcare and the decline in agriculture. However, one detail is inaccurate: healthcare begins at about 2 million, not 3 million. The account of healthcare is also less fully developed than the other sectors, as it gives only its starting and ending points and omits its rise to 5 million in 1980 and 11 million in 2000. More precise reporting of this progression would make the coverage more complete and consistently supported.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response is arranged clearly, moving from an introduction and overview to a paragraph describing the sector trends. Comparisons are signalled with phrases such as “However” and “On the contrary,” and the sequence of years in the retail description is easy to follow. This gives the report a coherent overall progression. To make the linking more flexible and less mechanical, avoid relying on repeated contrast markers and connect related trends more directly—for example, compare retail and healthcare as they converge at around 16 million jobs in 2020. The final paragraph also shifts between sectors within a long sentence, so clearer sentence boundaries or grouping the two declining/growing patterns would improve cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

There is an adequate range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “accelerated,” “moderate decline,” “kept growing,” and “declining.” The meaning is generally clear, but some less common choices are inaccurate or unnatural in this context. “Opportunity trends” and “most promising sector for opportunities” do not describe the number of jobs precisely, while “observed” is awkward when used for a sector’s change. “Downfall” is also too dramatic for a gradual decrease in employment. Aim for standard graph-reporting collocations and use them consistently; this will make the description more precise without requiring more elaborate vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “while,” “which,” and “starting from.” Most relationships between ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors are noticeable. For example, “Manufacturing have observed” has subject–verb disagreement, and “the downfall kept on going, and reached” has an awkwardly joined verb sequence. The sentence beginning “The same trend can be observed in healthcare” also combines several clauses with commas, making its structure less controlled. Review agreement and punctuation, and vary sentence boundaries so that each trend is expressed in a complete, well-formed sentence.

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