Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The multi-line graph illustrates regarding the number of employments in four different fields of the economy in the US within the given time frames from 1960 to 2020.

As it can be seen that healthcare and retail jobs were stood at 2 millions and just above the 5 millions in 1960, respectively then it went upward and marked at 5 millions jobs for healthcare industry and 10 millions jobs for retail , which is twice higher than healthcare jobs in 1980. Afterwards, retail jobs grew at 15 millions also healthcare jobs noted at just above the 10 millions in 2000, then both met at just above the 15 millions in 2020 and stayed there.

Furthermore, manufacturing and agricultural were going in opposite directions. For manufacturing the data was as, 15 millions in 1960, 20 millions in 1980 then significantly dropped around to 17 millions in 2000 and lastly reached at 14 millions, In contrast the agricultural jobs were very low. It started at 6 millions in 1960 then gradually declined and finally reached at 2 millions.

Overall, one can assume from the chart that manufacturing and agricultural job's moved in opposite directions, whereas retail and healthcare job’s showed inclined trend for both.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You cover all four sectors and report the main direction of change, including manufacturing’s rise and subsequent decline, agriculture’s fall, and growth in retail and healthcare. The figures are generally close to the chart. However, the overview is not fully accurate: retail and healthcare do not both “stay” at just above 15 million in 2020; they finish at about 16 million, and manufacturing remains the largest sector in 1980 before retail and healthcare catch up by 2020. The comparison that retail was “twice higher” than healthcare in 1980 is also imprecise. To strengthen the response, make the overview identify the changing ranking and the contrast between the declining agricultural sector and the other sectors more clearly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: the first main paragraph groups retail and healthcare, the next compares manufacturing with agriculture, and a final paragraph gives an overview. Sequencing words such as “Afterwards,” “Furthermore,” and “In contrast” help the reader follow the timeline and comparisons. This coherent structure is a strength. However, the overview comes last rather than guiding the report near the beginning, and some links are awkward or unclear, particularly “then both met … and stayed there,” which obscures the final values. The opening “As it can be seen” also creates an incomplete transition into the data. Use a concise overview after the introduction and make each comparison link directly to the figures it describes.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of topic vocabulary, including “manufacturing,” “agricultural,” “declined,” “grew,” and “opposite directions,” so the main trends are understandable. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision: “number of employments,” “fields of the economy,” “jobs were stood at,” and “showed inclined trend” do not express the data naturally. “Agricultural” is also used where the sector itself is meant, and “twice higher” is an imprecise comparison. Aim for standard chart-reporting phrases such as “number of jobs,” “stood at,” “rose to,” and “followed an upward trend.” More precise vocabulary will make the comparisons clearer without requiring more elaborate wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including time clauses and contrasts, and the reader can generally understand the trends. However, some sentence structures and verb forms are faulty. For example, “As it can be seen that” combines an introductory phrase with an unnecessary “that,” while “jobs were stood at” uses an incorrect passive construction. In “then it went upward and marked at,” the subject and verb pattern are unclear, and “manufacturing and agricultural were going” lacks a suitable noun or parallel structure. Punctuation also causes problems in the long first paragraph, especially around “respectively then.” Practise building shorter, controlled sentences with consistent past-tense verbs and clear subjects before combining ideas.

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