Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The diagram compares information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 and 2020 Ovearall,Manufacturing and Retail sectors had more jobs over the period of time. Whearas, Healthcare indusrty produces high jobs at the end of the period Agriculture sectore invited least jobs for the individual in US. In 1960, manufacturing had the highest number of jobs, at 15 million, and this figure rose to a peak of approximately 20 million in 1980. However, it then declined to around 16 million in 2000 and 12 million in 2020. In contrast, retail employment increased steadily from about 6 million in 1960 to 10 million in 1980, reaching approximately 15 million by 2020. Healthcare employment also showed a significant upward trend, rising from around 2 million jobs in 1960 to 5 million in 1980. It then increased considerably to about 10 million in 2000 and 15 million in 2020. By comparison, agriculture experienced an overall decline, falling from approximately 6 million jobs in 1960 to 3 million in 1980. The figure remained relatively stable at around 2–3 million in 2000 before dropping to just 1 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response identifies the main patterns and supports them with relevant figures: manufacturing peaks in 1980 before declining, healthcare rises substantially, and agriculture falls to the lowest level. The overview also recognises the strong position of manufacturing and retail and the late rise in healthcare. This is a solid account of the chart, though some details are not fully accurate: retail is reported as reaching 15 million in 2020, rather than about 16 million, and agriculture is said to fall to 1 million, rather than about 2 million. The overview’s claim that manufacturing and retail had more jobs “over the period” is also broad, since healthcare catches up with retail by 2020. More precise comparisons and a clearer overview would strengthen the response further.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction and overview are followed by paragraphs describing manufacturing and retail, then healthcare and agriculture. This grouping helps the reader follow the main trends, and transitions such as “In contrast” and “By comparison” signal comparisons. However, the opening section is difficult to read because the overview runs directly after the introduction with little clear separation, and punctuation and spacing are inconsistent. Some linking is also mechanical, with several sentences beginning with contrast markers. Use distinct paragraphs, punctuate the overview clearly, and connect related trends more naturally—for example, compare the similar 2020 totals for retail and healthcare in one sentence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The response uses a reasonable range of trend vocabulary, including “rose to a peak,” “declined,” “increased considerably,” and “remained relatively stable.” These choices communicate the broad movements clearly. However, several word-choice and spelling problems weaken precision: “produces high jobs” is not a natural way to describe employment, “invited least jobs” does not convey the intended meaning, and “sectore” and “Ovearall” are misspelled. “Number of jobs” or “employment” would be more suitable than “jobs for the individual.” Aim for accurate collocations and proofread spelling, while retaining the useful range of trend verbs already attempted.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

There is a mix of simple and more developed sentence forms, and most of the data-description sentences are understandable. For example, “In 1960, manufacturing had the highest number of jobs … and this figure rose to a peak” combines information effectively, while the later trend sentences use appropriate past-tense forms. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly in the opening: “from 1960 and 2020” should be “from 1960 to 2020,” and the overview has unclear sentence boundaries and punctuation. The phrase beginning “Whereas” is not properly connected to the preceding sentence. Review sentence boundaries, conjunctions, and punctuation, and check that each clause has a clear grammatical relationship.

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