Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

This line graph represents the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, there are total of four sectors, consisting of Manufacturing, Agriculture, Retail and Healthcare. Among of all, manufacturing was the very large area with slight decrease in the year 2020. Whereas, retail and healthcare gained significant popularity till the end. Agriculture was only sector with low job oppertunities.

In detail, manufacturing sector was significantly offering the job around 15 millions in the year 1960, from there, with the sharp rise, it reached up to the 20 millions in 1980, surprisingly after then, it gradully fell at 13 millions in the year 2020, making it less considerable work option for workers. As the graph shows, retail and healthcare both sectors were having less numbers of jobs, 6 and 3 millions, accordingly. Yet with the tike due to gradual rise both reached at the 16 millions

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the four sectors and report several key movements, including manufacturing rising from about 15 million jobs to 20 million before declining, and retail and healthcare increasing to around 16 million. However, the overview is not fully accurate: manufacturing was not the largest sector throughout, as retail and healthcare reached similar levels by 2020. Agriculture’s decline is mentioned only generally, and the response ends before reporting its later figures or making a complete comparison. The account is therefore partial and some important features are underdeveloped. It is also 139 words, below the required 150; develop the overview and include the missing trends and comparisons to meet the minimum.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic structure, with an introduction, an overview and a detail paragraph, and it uses some linking expressions such as “Overall,” “Whereas” and “Yet.” These help signal the intended stages of the description. However, progression is limited: the final paragraph moves from manufacturing to retail and healthcare without clearly organising the series or completing the comparison, and it stops mid-thought. Some connections are also awkward or unclear, particularly “As the graph shows” followed by “Yet with the tike.” To improve, group related trends consistently, use clear time-based sequencing, and finish with a complete comparison of all four sectors.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “sectors,” “sharp rise,” “gradually fell” and “job opportunities,” so the reader can generally understand the subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes parts of the description difficult to interpret. For example, “manufacturing was the very large area” does not naturally describe the sector with the most jobs, while “gained significant popularity” describes popularity rather than employment. “Less considerable work option” is also imprecise. There are noticeable spelling errors, including “oppertunities,” “gradully” and “tike.” Use precise terms such as “employment,” “number of jobs” and “increased,” and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some complex sentences, for example, “from there, with the sharp rise, it reached up to the 20 millions in 1980,” and use time clauses to describe change. However, these structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. Examples include “there are total of four sectors” (missing an article), “Among of all,” and “both sectors were having less numbers of jobs.” The final sentence is incomplete, with no punctuation after “16 millions.” There are also problems with articles, plurals and sentence boundaries. Practise writing shorter, complete comparisons first, then combine them accurately using clauses such as “after which” or “while.”

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