Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates information about number of jobs in four sectors of the US economy from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, number of jobs increased in Retail and Healthcare over the period while they decreased in Agriculture and there is only one sector Manufacturing where they fluctuated, first rose sharply and then in 1980 it gradually declined till 2020.

Regarding the inclined jobs trend, Retail jobs increased from approximately 6 millions to 15 millions and then it stayed constant for a while and grew again around 16 million in 2020. While Healthcare department jobs increased from around 2 millions to 5 million in the period of 1960 to 1980 and then they continue to grew faster and reached 16 million in 2020.

On the other hand, jobs declined in Agriculture and Manufacturing. In Agriculture, the jobs fell down from 6 million to 1 million in between 1960 to 2020. Meanwhile, in Manufacturing jobs inclinded sharply from 15 million to 20 million and then in 1980 they declined gradually and reached around 13 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You provide a clear overview of the main directions: retail and healthcare rise, agriculture falls, and manufacturing peaks before declining. The account also selects relevant comparisons and includes several approximate figures, such as manufacturing’s rise from 15 to 20 million and healthcare’s growth from 2 to 16 million. Most trends are accurately represented. However, the overview says manufacturing fluctuated, which is less precise than describing its rise to a peak and subsequent fall; the retail plateau is also not clearly supported by the plotted points. Agriculture ends at about 2 million, not 1 million, so this figure should be corrected. More precise descriptions of the stages and endpoints would make the otherwise well-focused summary more consistently accurate.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response is organised into an introduction, overview, and two detail paragraphs, with a sensible grouping of rising sectors and declining sectors. This gives the reader a clear overall route through the information. Linking phrases such as “Overall,” “Regarding,” and “On the other hand” help signal the structure, although some transitions feel formulaic or do not fit the information smoothly. For example, “Regarding the inclined jobs trend” is an awkward lead-in, and “While” begins a sentence fragment before the healthcare comparison. The overview also combines several trends in a long sentence, making the manufacturing point less clear. Use more natural links and ensure each sentence has a clear relationship to the one before it.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing graphs, including “increased,” “declined,” “approximately,” and “reached,” and the reader can generally understand the comparisons. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are noticeably inaccurate: “inclined jobs trend,” “jobs fell down,” and “inclined sharply” are not natural ways to describe these movements. “Department jobs” is also an imprecise label for an economic sector. Spelling errors such as “inclinded” further reduce accuracy. Aim for a more controlled set of graph-description terms, using “rose,” “fell,” “peaked,” and “remained stable” where appropriate, and check spelling and collocations before finishing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including comparisons joined with “while” and “and then,” but control is inconsistent. Errors include missing articles in “about number of jobs” and “in Retail and Healthcare,” incorrect verb forms in “they continue to grew,” and agreement problems in “number of jobs increased … while they decreased.” The sentence beginning “While Healthcare department jobs…” is not complete as written, and “in between 1960 to 2020” shows an inaccurate prepositional pattern. These errors sometimes make the relationships between ideas harder to follow, although the main message remains understandable. Practise complete sentence structures and check articles, subject–verb agreement, verb forms, and tense consistency.

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