Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates the data about number of jobs in Agriculture , Manufacturing , Retail and Healthcare sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. The graph shows that number of jobs in the Agriculture and the Manufacturing sectors have reduced from 1960 to 2020 . Meanwhile, the number of jobs in the Retail and the Healthcare sectors have risen significantly throughout the timeline.

The graph shows that there were 5 million jobs in the Agriculture sector during 1960s, which dropped to around 3 million in 1980 . Furthermore, it dropped to less than 2 million in 2020. The Manufacturing sector had the maximum number of jobs among all the sectors from 1960 to 2000. At it's peak, there were 20 million jobs during the 1980s. The number dropped to around 13 million jobs in 2020.

The Retail and Healthcare sectors saw the maximum growth in jobs over these 60 years. Retail sector grew from 5 million jobs in 1960 to 15 million jobs in 2020 alongside Healthcare sector which also grew from less than 5 million jobs in 1960 to 15 million jobs in 2020.

This growth indicates the shift in pattern of US economy from it's dependency on Agriculture and Manufaturing sectors to Retail and Healthcare sectors.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You give a clear overview of the contrasting trends: agriculture and manufacturing decline overall, while retail and healthcare rise. You also select relevant details, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million and agriculture’s fall to around 3 million by 1980. The main limitation is that several figures and comparisons are inaccurate: agriculture starts at about 6 million, not 5, and ends at about 2 million; retail rises from about 6 to 16 million, not 5 to 15; healthcare goes from about 2 to 16 million, rather than less than 5 to 15. The claim that manufacturing had the most jobs through 2000 overlooks retail’s rise to about 15 million by then. More precise reporting would strengthen an otherwise clear summary.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response is organised into a clear introduction and overview, followed by paragraphs describing the declining sectors and the growing sectors. This gives the reader a logical progression, and linking expressions such as “Meanwhile” and “Furthermore” help connect the information. The final sentence also attempts to draw together the trends. Some connections could be more precise: “alongside Healthcare sector” does not clearly explain how the two series compare, and the final economic interpretation goes beyond what the graph directly demonstrates. Use comparisons that explicitly identify the relevant years and values, and keep the conclusion focused on the chart. Overall, the structure is clear and cohesive, though a few links and references could be more carefully controlled.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “dropped,” “peak,” “grew,” and “dependency,” and the meaning is generally clear. However, some choices are imprecise or repetitive: “maximum growth” is less natural than “largest increase,” while “the data about number of jobs” is awkward. There are also spelling errors in “Manufaturing” and “it's” where the possessive “its” is intended. The repeated use of “jobs” and “grew” could be varied with accurate terms such as “employment,” “rose,” or “increased.” Greater care with collocation, spelling, and precise trend vocabulary would make the description more fluent and controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, including the contrast introduced by “Meanwhile” and the relative clause in “which dropped to around 3 million.” Most sentences communicate the intended trends, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “number of jobs … have reduced” has a subject–verb agreement problem and needs an article (“the number … has declined”). In “there were 5 million jobs … during 1960s,” the decade needs an article or a more precise year reference. “At it's peak” also uses the wrong form of the possessive pronoun. These issues do not prevent understanding, but checking agreement, articles, and punctuation around sentence endings would improve accuracy while preserving your range of structures.

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