Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrates the changes in employement status in four economic sector from 1960 to 2020, measured in millions.

Overall, the two sector that dominates the market are Retail and Healthcare. whereas, agriculture almost shows steady decrease throughout the period. Healthcare on the other hand, was the highest and reached to the peak and then stadily went down gradually.

In 1960, the highest number of employment opportunities were in health care at around 15 million then followed by retail and agriculture at around 5 million active jobs. The lowest that was recorded in that particular time frame was healthcare was half of that of the formal two.

Between 1960 to 1980, all the sectors gradually increases except agriculture with the numbers showing around 20million for Manufactoring followed by 10 million and 5 million for retail and healthcare respectively. The agriculture sector ended at slide decrease.

Finally between [redacted phone], Retail and Healthcare were the two sector capturing the market based on opportunities finishing at above 15 millions at the end of the period. Whereas, Manufactoring was the most effective sector falling sharply at the end of period followed by Agriculture finishing at almost 13 million and 3 millions. Overall, Agriculture sector throughout the decades never experience any dramatic growth or fall and remains steady.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies several relevant trends, including agriculture’s decline and the later importance of retail and healthcare. However, key information is repeatedly misreported, which makes the account only minimally successful in describing the graph. In 1960, manufacturing—not healthcare—was highest at about 15 million, while healthcare was lowest at around 2 million. The overview also says healthcare peaked and then fell, although it rose throughout the period to about 16 million. Later, manufacturing is said to finish at almost 13 million and agriculture at 3 million, but these figures are reversed: manufacturing ended near 13 million and agriculture near 2 million. Focus on accurate comparisons and a clear overview of the main trends before adding details.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic paragraph structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details for different periods. Time markers such as “In 1960,” “Between 1960 to 1980,” and “Finally” help signal sequence. However, the progression is not consistently clear: the overview contains contradictory claims, and the final paragraph mixes comparisons with a repeated statement about agriculture. Some linking words are used awkwardly or repetitively, including “whereas” at the start of sentences and “Overall” in both the overview and conclusion. Grouping the data by clear trends—rising sectors, declining sectors, and key endpoint comparisons—would make the information easier to follow and reduce repetition.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

There is some useful task-related vocabulary, including “measured in millions,” “steady decrease,” “peak,” and “falling sharply.” These choices show an attempt to describe trends rather than simply list figures. However, several word choices are inaccurate or unnatural for a graph report: “employment status” does not mean the number of jobs, “capturing the market” is informal, and “most effective sector” does not describe employment levels. Spelling errors such as “employement” and “Manufactoring,” along with phrases such as “active jobs,” also reduce precision. Use standard trend language and check spelling so that the reader can distinguish clearly between increases, decreases, and final values.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both simple and more complex sentences, for example, “Overall, the two sector that dominates the market are Retail and Healthcare” and “Between 1960 to 1980, all the sectors gradually increases except agriculture.” However, errors in agreement, tense, articles, and sentence construction occur frequently and sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “two sector,” “dominates,” “all the sectors … increases,” and “never experience.” The sentence beginning “The lowest that was recorded…” is also structurally unclear, while punctuation around “whereas” and “on the other hand” is inconsistent. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and subject–verb agreement, and use shorter, complete sentences when describing figures.

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