Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line chart compares the jobs in four sectors of US economy-Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, Healthcare-for over eight decades from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, Manufacuring sector domainated the job market over the period. Two sectors (Retail and Healthcare) showed an upward trend, whereas other sectors (Manufacturing and Agricuture) demonstrated the downward trend. Also, Retail and Heathcare became shared most popular jobs overtaking Heathcare by the end of the period.

There are two sector that showed decreasing trends: Manufacturing Agriculture. At 1960, Manufacturing was the most popular jobs among Americans with 15 million jobs. The number of jobs increased to 20 million in 1980, before drastically declining to around 13 million at the end of 2020. Agriculture followed similar pattern, but its decrement was not as steep, and presented a minimal fall from approximately 6 million jobs in 1960 to around 2.5 million in 2020.

In contrast, Retail and Healthcare showed postive patterns, where both sectors demonstrated sharp increment from around 6 million jobs and in the ball park of 2.5 million jobs in 1960 for Retail and Heathcare respectively to around 16 million in 2020, sharing the spot for the most popular jobs, and overtaking Manufacturing at around 2005 by Retail and approximately at 2012 by Healthcare.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response identifies the main movements and gives a clear overview: manufacturing rises to a peak before declining, agriculture falls, and retail and healthcare grow to become joint leaders by 2020. It also supports these points with relevant figures, including manufacturing’s 20 million peak and agriculture’s fall from about 6 million to around 2.5 million. This covers the task well, with some features more fully reported than others. However, the overview says manufacturing “dominated” over the period, although retail and healthcare both reach about 16 million by 2020, and the claim that retail overtook manufacturing around 2005 is not directly supported by the chart’s four plotted years. Clarify that manufacturing led for much of the period, and avoid precise crossover dates not shown by the data.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response is organised into a clear introduction, overview, and two body paragraphs grouped by declining and rising sectors. This gives the reader a logical route through the information, and transitions such as “In contrast” help signal the comparison. The main weakness is that some links and references are awkward or unclear. For example, “overtaking Heathcare by the end” appears to name healthcare as the sector being overtaken, while the final sentence’s sequence of figures makes it difficult to tell which starting value belongs to which sector. The overview also repeats the idea of sectors becoming most popular. Make comparisons in shorter, more direct sentences and ensure each pronoun or comparison clearly identifies the sector concerned.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

There is an adequate range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “upward trend,” “declining,” “drastically declining,” and “overtaking.” These choices help communicate the broad pattern, and the writer attempts more varied expressions such as “in the ball park.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or too informal for an academic report: “jobs in four sectors,” “sector dominated the job market,” “minimal fall,” and “sharp increment” are not natural in this context. Spelling errors such as “Manufacuring,” “Agricuture,” “Heathcare,” and “postive” also reduce accuracy. Prefer precise, conventional chart language, such as “employment,” “number of jobs,” “rose sharply,” and “declined gradually,” and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and more complex structures, including a contrast clause with “whereas” and a time sequence with “before.” Most of the intended meaning remains understandable, but some grammatical errors occur across the response. Examples include “There are two sector,” which needs plural agreement, and “At 1960,” where the time preposition is incorrect. The phrase “from around 6 million jobs and in the ball park of 2.5 million jobs in 1960 for Retail and Heathcare respectively” lacks a clear grammatical structure, making the comparison hard to follow. There are also punctuation and sentence-boundary issues, such as the compressed list in the introduction. Build accuracy by checking articles, plurals, prepositions, and parallel sentence structures, especially when comparing two series.

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