Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph displays the job varience(in millions) in four different sectors-manufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare- in the US economy from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, The job sectors has varied significantly over the past couple of decades. Healthcare and retail sectors have increased its job market by a significant margin over the years. While, Manufacturing sector has dropped over the years. Agriculture, on the other hand, has decreased slightly over the years.

Initally, retail sector started its job market with just above five million in 1960. With a steady growth over the years, it has now succesfully reached over fifteen million in 2020. Likewise, heathcare sector which started with just around two million in 1960 has maintained its growth rate and reached around the same level as retail in 2020.

However, manufacturing started at the highest amongst all in 1960 with approximately fifteen milllion in 1960 and peaked during 1980 with reaching the highest record of around twenty million. But after the sudden spike, it has been decreasing significantly. In 2020 manufacturing has just over thirtheen million. Agriculture,converesly, started above five million in 1960, but decreased over time with just around two million remaining in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response selects the main trends and gives a clear overview: healthcare and retail rise, manufacturing declines after a peak, and agriculture falls. It also supports these points with relevant start and end figures, such as manufacturing at about 15 million in 1960 and 13 million in 2020. The comparison that healthcare reaches a similar level to retail by 2020 is particularly useful. To make the account more fully developed, report the key intermediate changes more precisely: retail rises from 10 million in 1980 to 15 million in 2000, while healthcare grows from 5 to 11 million over the same period. Also, “over the past couple of decades” is too narrow for a period spanning 1960–2020; describe the full timeframe instead.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The information is organised in a clear sequence: an introduction, an overview, and then paragraphs describing the rising sectors and the declining sectors. This makes the main comparisons easy to follow, and linking expressions such as “Likewise,” “However,” and “on the other hand” help signal relationships between trends. The progression is generally logical, though some transitions are slightly awkward or overused. For example, “While, Manufacturing sector…” is not a complete contrast structure, and “Agriculture, conversely” repeats a contrast already established. Improve cohesion by connecting the comparison directly—for instance, explain that retail and healthcare both finish at about 16 million—rather than relying on a new linking word for each sentence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The response uses a reasonable range of task-related vocabulary, including “peaked,” “steady growth,” “decreased,” and “approximately,” so the trends are generally understandable. However, several noticeable spelling and word-choice problems reduce precision: “varience,” “succesfully,” “heathcare,” “milllion,” and “thirtheen” are misspelled, while “job market” is not the most natural way to describe the number of jobs in a sector. “Sudden spike” also overstates the graph’s gradual rise to the 1980 peak. Aim for accurate, conventional chart language and proofread carefully. More precise verbs such as “rose,” “declined,” and “stood at” would help you report the data clearly without awkward or exaggerated phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “which” and “while,” and most of the intended meaning can be understood. However, errors recur in agreement, sentence construction, and punctuation. For example, “The job sectors has varied” should use a plural verb, and “Healthcare and retail sectors have increased its job market” has a pronoun-agreement problem as well as an awkward construction. “While, Manufacturing sector has dropped” is an incomplete sentence, and “peaked during 1980 with reaching” is not a well-formed verb pattern. Capitalisation after the overview’s opening word and commas around introductory phrases also need attention. Practise complete contrast clauses and check subject–verb agreement in each sentence.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.