Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrates the data about the number of jobs in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare sectors of the economy in the United States from 1960 to 2020.that

Overall, it is evident that the highest figure of jobs recorded in manufacturing sector whereas agriculture sector accounted for the lowest jobs oppotunities in the US. The figure has shown in millions.

In the contrast, In 1960, 15 millions people got jobs in manufacturing sector while it increased by 20 million in 1980. After that the figure has declined by 13 million in 2020. On the contrary, 3 million jobs has recorded in Healthcare in 1960. It showed total 16 million jobs that was continuously increased till 2020.

To compare with, Retail and agriculture started with 7 million jobs in 1960. However, the figure increased by 17 million in retail sector and

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the four sectors and give a broad overview that manufacturing was highest and agriculture lowest, which is relevant to the graph. However, the report is incomplete and covers the data only minimally: it stops mid-sentence at “the figure increased by 17 million in retail sector,” and gives no account of agriculture’s decline or the later retail figures. Several details are inaccurate: healthcare began at 2 million, not 3 million; retail began at 6 million, not 7 million; and manufacturing peaked at 20 million in 1980 before falling to 13 million, rather than simply declining “by 13 million.” The response is also 9 words below the required minimum. To improve, complete the comparison and report the main trends and key endpoint values accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an introduction is followed by an overview and then detail about manufacturing, healthcare, retail and agriculture. However, progression is weakened because the final paragraph ends abruptly with “and,” leaving the comparison unfinished, and agriculture receives no developed description. Linking phrases such as “In the contrast,” “On the contrary,” and “To compare with” are used mechanically or do not clearly express the relationship between the figures. The overview also does not prepare the reader for the later comparisons. Use clear paragraphs for the overview and grouped trends, and connect comparisons directly—for example, contrast the rising healthcare and retail figures with agriculture’s decline.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is sufficient to identify the chart’s subject and sectors, and phrases such as “accounted for the lowest” and “declined” show some attempt to use report-style language. However, the range is limited and several choices or collocations are inaccurate, including “jobs opportunities,” “the figure has shown in millions,” and “the figure increased by 17 million in retail sector.” “Highest figure of jobs recorded” is also awkward, while “data about” is less precise than a direct description of what the graph shows. These choices sometimes make the intended meaning less clear. Aim for accurate chart language such as “the number of jobs,” “stood at,” “rose to,” and “fell to,” and check spelling, including “opportunities.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including a contrast with “while” and a relative clause in “jobs that was continuously increased.” However, grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes make relationships between figures difficult to follow. Examples include the sentence fragment “Overall, it is evident that the highest figure of jobs recorded…,” the missing space and stray “that” after the introduction, and “15 millions people got jobs.” Verb forms are also unreliable: “3 million jobs has recorded” and “it increased by 20 million” do not clearly express the intended figures. Articles, agreement, plurals and punctuation need more consistent control. Practise complete subject–verb sentences and use simple, accurate past-tense forms such as “Manufacturing employment rose to 20 million.”

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