Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrate the information about jobs in retail, agriculture, healthcare, and manufacturing of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Firstly, In 1960, manufacturing delivering the most number of jobs in the US. While retail and agriculture contributed around 7 millions jobs. Healthcare provided the lowest jobs in 1960.
In 1980, manufacturing, retail and healthcare make a high jump in the graph and agriculture sees a dip in providing the jobs.
In the year 2020, healthcare and retail dethrown the everyone and contributed the most in the US economy and their figures goes to around 16 millions. While on the other hand, manufactring that is contributed highest number of jobs in US in 1960 faces a massive dip in his graph in 2020. Agriculture is remain the lowest contributed in the US economy in the years of 2000 and 2020. Agriculture provide only 2 millions jobs that is the lowest number as compared to other three sectors.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You identify several important features: manufacturing is highest at the start, healthcare and retail reach about 16 million jobs by 2020, and agriculture is the smallest sector at the end. However, the account is only partial and lacks a clear overview of the main changes across the whole period. Some details are inaccurate or too vague: retail and agriculture were about 6 million, not 7 million, in 1960; and the 1980 description says three sectors made a “high jump” without reporting their values or distinguishing their later trends. Include the key turning points—for example, manufacturing peaks at 20 million in 1980 before declining, while healthcare rises steadily—and compare the sectors more precisely.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a generally understandable sequence, moving from 1960 to 1980 and then 2020, and the repeated time references help the reader follow the account. The ideas are grouped into separate paragraphs, although the opening paragraph is only an introduction and there is no distinct overview to guide the reader through the main trends. Some linking is mechanical or unclear: “Firstly” and repeated “While” constructions do not always show the relationship between the figures, and “dethrown the everyone” makes the comparison difficult to follow. Organise the report around an overview followed by clear comparisons, and use links such as “by contrast,” “whereas,” and “over the following decades” accurately.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “dip,” “lowest,” and “contributed,” and the reader can usually identify the sectors being discussed. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes obscuring meaning. For example, “dethrown the everyone” is not an appropriate way to describe sectors becoming joint leaders, while “manufacturing delivering” and “faces a massive dip in his graph” are awkward. There are also spelling errors such as “manufactring.” Choose precise chart language such as “rose,” “declined,” “peaked,” and “accounted for,” and check spelling and natural combinations of words before submitting.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response attempts both simple and more extended sentences, and its time-based structure makes the general meaning accessible. However, grammatical control is inconsistent, particularly in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction. Examples include “The line graph illustrate,” “manufacturing delivering,” “their figures goes,” and “Agriculture is remain”; these errors make some statements difficult to interpret. The sentence beginning “While retail and agriculture…” is also a fragment, and several clauses joined with “While” are not punctuated or structured clearly. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and subject–verb agreement, and build comparisons as complete sentences—for example, “Retail and agriculture each had about six million jobs in 1960.”
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