Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy over four deades in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it is evident that manufacturing was upward trend throughout the period, while agriculture was pluged. However healthcare and retail were rapidly increasing.

Firstly, in 1960 manufacturing was 15 millions, while this figure increased and became 20 millions in 1980. However the number of jobs steadily decreased to approximately 13 millions in 2020. Whereas in 1960 agriculture was around 6 millions thereafter in 1980 and 2000 it remained stable after that there was slight decrease about 3 million in 2020.

Secondly, in 1960 healthcare was the lowest figure with 2 millions jobs then in 1980 it mimimally increase and became 5 millions. Meanwhile it dramatically increase to 16 millions of jobs in 2020. Regarding in 1960 retail was around 6 millions , while in 1980 gradually increase to 10 millions. Whereas in 2020 it sugred to approximately 16 millions jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and report several key figures, including manufacturing’s peak at 20 million in 1980 and agriculture’s decline. However, the overview contains a major factual error: manufacturing did not rise throughout; it peaked in 1980 and then fell. The statement that healthcare and retail increased rapidly is broadly accurate, but the comparison that both reached about 16 million by 2020 would be stronger if you noted that healthcare rose from 2 million and retail from 6 million. Some details are unclear or incomplete, such as agriculture remaining at about 3 million through 2000 before falling to 2 million. A more accurate overview and fuller comparisons would make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear basic structure: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs grouped by sectors. Sequencing expressions such as “Firstly” and “Secondly” help readers follow the description, and the figures are generally presented in a sensible order. However, some linking is mechanical or confusing. For example, “Whereas” begins a sentence that does not clearly contrast with the preceding point, and “Regarding in 1960” makes the transition to retail awkward. The overview also places contrasting trends together without explaining them clearly. Use more precise links to show comparisons and changes over time, and ensure each paragraph develops a clear grouping of related information.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary for describing charts, including “steadily decreased,” “remained stable,” and “dramatically increase,” so the main trends are usually understandable. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, spelling, or collocation errors reduce precision. “Agriculture was pluged” is unclear, “mimimally increase” is not an appropriate description, and “sugred” appears to mean “surged.” Phrases such as “15 millions” and “16 millions jobs” also show weak control of number expressions. Choose accurate trend verbs and use “million” consistently after a number. More varied, correctly formed language would help you describe the data with greater precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and longer sentences, including clauses joined with “while” and “after that,” but control is inconsistent. Errors in verb forms and agreement occur in phrases such as “healthcare and retail were rapidly increasing,” “it mimimally increase,” and “it dramatically increase.” Some sentence boundaries and punctuation are also faulty: the opening overview joins contrasting ideas awkwardly, while commas are missing or misplaced in several data descriptions. Articles and plural forms are not consistently controlled, as in “with 2 millions jobs.” Practise accurate past-tense reporting and build complex sentences around clear subjects and verbs; this will make the comparisons easier to follow.

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