Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph shows the information about the figures of jobs from 1960 to 2020 in four sectors of economy in the United States .

Overall, what stands from the graph is that Retail and Healthcare areas depicts a considerable upward trend while the agriculture sector demonstrates a considerable downward trend over the period. One interesting point is that manufacturing domain increased at start but then decreased considerably over the years.

Looking at the details, manufacturing domain figures went up significantly till 1980. It then saw a downward trend and the figures for job fell down and reached to 13 million in 2022. If we look at the agriculture sector, it decreased gradually from 5 million jobs to 3 million jobs till 1980. After that, it levelled off from 1980 to 2000, and the decreased gradually from till 2020.

Turning to the Retail sector, the figures for the jobs rose steadily from 5 million in 1960 to 15 million in 2000 and remained almost stable till 2020. Healthcare area saw a considerable upward trend from 1960 to 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main overall patterns: retail and healthcare rise, agriculture declines, and manufacturing peaks before falling. You also include several useful figures, such as manufacturing reaching 20 million in 1980 and agriculture levelling off at 3 million through 2000. However, some details are inaccurate: manufacturing ends at 13 million in 2020, not 2022; agriculture starts at about 6 million, rather than 5; and retail reaches about 16 million in 2020, so describing it as almost stable after 2000 misses its continued rise. Healthcare is only summarised generally, without figures or comparison with retail. More accurate endpoint reporting and fuller coverage of healthcare would make the account more complete and precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and detail paragraphs that group manufacturing with agriculture before turning to retail and healthcare. This gives the reader a coherent route through the information, and phrases such as “Looking at the details” and “Turning to the Retail sector” signal transitions. To strengthen progression further, organise the details more consistently around the four series and make the comparisons explicit—for example, noting that healthcare catches up with retail by 2020. Some linking is mechanical, and the final sentence about healthcare is isolated rather than developed with a figure or comparison. Clearer links between the overview and supporting details would make the cohesion more flexible.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a reasonable range of trend vocabulary, including “upward trend,” “downward trend,” “rose steadily,” and “levelled off,” which helps describe changes across the period. There are also attempts at more formal wording, such as “considerable” and “significantly.” However, some choices are unnatural or imprecise: “figures of jobs” and “manufacturing domain” are less suitable than direct terms such as “number of jobs” and “manufacturing sector.” “Fell down” is also an awkward collocation in this context. Repetition of “considerable” and “trend” limits variety, while extra spaces and inconsistent capitalisation slightly reduce polish. Aim for precise sector names and natural collocations rather than ornate substitutes.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex forms, including the contrast in “increased at start but then decreased” and the time clauses describing changes “till 1980” and “from 1980 to 2000.” Most of the meaning remains clear. Some grammatical errors are present, however: “Retail and Healthcare areas depicts” has subject–verb disagreement, and “and the decreased gradually from till 2020” is an incomplete, faulty construction. The sentence about manufacturing also gives “2022,” which disrupts the time reference, while punctuation and spacing around full stops are inconsistent. Check agreement with plural subjects, use complete clauses, and proofread tense and time expressions to improve accuracy.

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