Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The graph shows the number of jobs, in millions, in four sectors of the economy in the US divided 3 time periods between 1960 and 2020.

The structure of US jobs in 1960 was dominantly composed of secondary industry, as manufacturing industry employed 15 million people. Primary and tertiary industries had significantly lower employment rates, at around 5 million jobs in both retail and agriculture and at around 2.5 million in healthcare.

Jobs in manufacturing industry continued to grow until the year 1980 and then took a steady decline until 2020, going below 15 million jobs. During the same period, jobs in agriculture had a significant decline until 1980 and then entered a period of stanation which lasted until 2020.

The most significant changes in 6 decades shown on this graph occured in the retail and healthcare industries, which had a different rates of jobs in the US in 1960 but ended with similar number of jobs in 2020, both at around 15 million. Healthcare industry had a sharp increase of jobs in the period between 2000 and 2020, while retail industry had 4 decades of steady increase of jobs between 1960 and 2000.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response identifies several important patterns: manufacturing peaks in 1980 before declining, agriculture falls and then levels off, and retail and healthcare both finish at roughly 15–16 million jobs. These comparisons show a sound grasp of the chart. However, the opening does not provide a clear overall summary of the main changes across all four sectors, and some details are inaccurate: retail and agriculture are about 6 million each in 1960, rather than around 5 million, while healthcare is about 2 million, not 2.5 million. The account also says healthcare rose sharply between 2000 and 2020, although its strongest growth began earlier, from 1980 to 2000. A concise overview and more precise comparisons would make the key features more fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The information is arranged in a clear sequence: an introduction, the 1960 starting point, trends in manufacturing and agriculture, and finally retail and healthcare. This gives the reader a logical route through the data, and phrases such as “During the same period” and “while” help connect comparisons. The paragraphing is also appropriate. To make the progression more effective, add a distinct overview near the beginning that groups the broad trends—for example, manufacturing’s rise and fall, agriculture’s decline, and the growth of retail and healthcare. Some links are slightly imprecise: “During the same period” could refer to more than one time span, so naming the years would make the relationship clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

The response uses a reasonably varied range of topic vocabulary, including “steady decline,” “significant decline,” “sharp increase,” and “period of stagnation.” These choices help describe movement rather than merely list figures. There are, however, some inaccurate or unnatural collocations: “dominantly composed” is awkward for describing employment structure, and “different rates of jobs” does not clearly express the contrast between the sectors. “Stanation” and “occured” are spelling errors, while “industry” is repeated frequently. Aim for more precise chart language and check spelling, especially when using less common terms. These issues do not prevent understanding, but more natural phrasing and greater variety would improve precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

There is a useful mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including the relative clause “which had a different rates of jobs” and the contrast structure “while retail industry had…”. Most sentences communicate the intended trends, and the past tense is generally appropriate for the historical data. Some grammatical errors remain. For example, “which had a different rates” has a number-agreement problem, and “ended with similar number of jobs” needs an article before “similar number.” The opening sentence’s “divided 3 time periods” is also structurally unclear. Review articles, singular/plural agreement, and sentence construction, while retaining the longer comparative structures that are already helping you express relationships.

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