Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph tracks the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the manufacturing sector had the highest number of jobs at first, and then decreased over the period. Healthcare institutions had the lowest number, while the retail and agriculture sectors showed progress throughout the period and reached the same number in the last year.

Manufacturing had 15 million jobs in 1960, reached 20 million in 1980, while it decreased to 17 million in 2000 and to 8 million in 2020. The number of retail sector jobs started at 6 million in 1960, rising to 10 million in 1980, reaching 15 million in 2000, and 16 million in 2020. The agriculture sector had the lowest number of jobs at 3 million in 1960, and showed a sharp increase to 5 million in 1980,12 million in 2000, and reached 16 million in 2020. Healthcare numbers started at 6 million in 1960, and decreased to 3 million in 1980, and remained steady until 2000 and reached to 2 million by 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response identifies the broad contrast between manufacturing and the other sectors, but several central figures and trends are substantially misreported, which makes the account unreliable. Manufacturing is said to fall to 8 million in 2020, whereas the chart shows about 13 million. More seriously, the agriculture figures are largely reversed: this sector declines from about 6 million to 2 million, rather than rising from 3 to 16 million. The healthcare and retail descriptions are also swapped: healthcare rises from 2 to 16 million, while retail rises from 6 to 16 million. The overview therefore gives an inaccurate account of which sectors grew or declined. To improve, check each line against the graph and summarise the genuine overall patterns before selecting key figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph reporting figures. It also uses basic sequencing language such as “Overall,” “while,” and “and then,” so the reader can follow the intended comparisons. However, the body moves through the sectors in a list-like way, and the inaccurate sector descriptions make the comparisons difficult to track. The overview’s claim that retail and agriculture both progress also conflicts with the chart, weakening the logical progression from overview to details. Grouping the two rising sectors together and the declining sectors together would create a clearer comparison. Use linking expressions to show contrasts and changes, rather than relying mainly on repeated “and” constructions.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for describing a line graph, with relevant terms such as “reached,” “decreased,” “rising,” “started,” and “remained steady.” These choices generally communicate movement clearly, and the response avoids excessive repetition of a single verb. Some wording is imprecise or unnatural, however: “tracks the information” is less direct than “shows the number,” and “showed progress” does not clearly describe a rise in employment. “Healthcare institutions” also refers to organisations rather than the employment sector itself. Aim for precise trend language and natural collocations, such as “employment in healthcare” or “the number of jobs increased.” Accurate vocabulary will also help distinguish the four sectors consistently.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and more extended sentence forms, including clauses joined with “while” and participial phrases such as “rising to 10 million.” Most sentences remain understandable, but some grammatical and punctuation issues reduce accuracy. In “reached 20 million in 1980, while it decreased,” the comma and “while” create an awkward connection between sequential changes; a full stop or “before falling” would be clearer. There is no space after the comma in “1980,12 million,” and “reached to 2 million” uses an unnecessary preposition. The phrase “had the lowest number … at 3 million” is also grammatically possible but conflicts with the intended comparison. Continue practising accurate clause linking and check punctuation and prepositions.

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