Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given image is a line graph that provides the information about the number of jobs in four different sectors which includes Manufacturing, Retail,Agricultureand Healthcare between 1960 and 2020.

Overall,it shows the improvement in Manufacturing sector whereas it illustrates decline in Agricultural sector between 1960 and 1980.

There is improvement in Manufacturing sector as the number of employement is slightly increase from fifteen millions to twenty millions in the same way the other sectors like Retail and Healthcare where there is also increment in its opportunities by double of prevous year. On the other side, the opportunity in Agriculture sector is slightly decreses from more than five millions to below that number.

The data among 1980 to 2020 demonstrates that the number of jobs in Manufacturing sector is slightly decreases however the jobs in Retail and Healthcare sectors was gradually increases. Additionally,in Agriculture,the number of jobs was constant between 1980 and 2000 but afer that the line goes down which again shows the massine decline in this sector.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and make relevant comparisons, including manufacturing’s rise to 1980 and agriculture’s overall decline. However, the overview is incomplete and partly inaccurate: it says manufacturing improves overall, although it falls from 20 million in 1980 to 13 million in 2020, and it does not highlight that retail and healthcare both reach about 16 million by 2020, becoming the largest sectors. Some figures and trends are also unclear: retail rises from 6 to 10 to 15 to 16 million, while healthcare grows from 2 to 5 to 11 to 16 million, rather than simply doubling. To strengthen the response, give a clear overview of the contrasting long-term trends and report the main figures accurately across the full period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing changes. This gives the reader some organisation, and phrases such as “On the other side” signal a contrast. However, progression is not consistently clear because the overview focuses on 1960–1980, while the final paragraph returns to the later period without a clear comparison of all four sectors. Linking phrases are sometimes mechanical or imprecise, and the long third paragraph combines several trends in a way that makes relationships difficult to follow. Group the sectors by their main patterns—for example, rising retail and healthcare versus declining agriculture—and use clear time markers to guide the reader through the data.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “line graph,” “sectors,” “decline,” and “constant,” so the topic is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “improvement” and “opportunities” for changes in job numbers, and “massine decline.” Repetition of “number of jobs” and “sector” also limits flexibility. Spelling errors such as “employement,” “prevous,” and “decreses” are noticeable and reduce precision. Aim for accurate trend language and collocations, such as “employment rose,” “the figure remained stable,” and “the sector experienced a sharp fall.” Check spelling and choose words that describe the data rather than imply that a change is beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “whereas” and “however.” Nevertheless, errors occur frequently and sometimes make the relationships between ideas difficult to interpret. Examples include “the number of employement is slightly increase,” “the jobs … was gradually increases,” and “the number of jobs was constant … but afer that the line goes down.” These show problems with verb forms, subject–verb agreement, and consistent tense. Articles and sentence punctuation are also unreliable, as in “Additionally,in Agriculture.” Practise describing past data consistently in the past tense, checking that each subject has a matching verb, and separating long sentences into clearer units. More accurate control of these basic patterns would make your comparisons easier to understand.

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