Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The given graph represents the numerical data of four working sectors of the economy in the US in years from 1960 to 2020. The data is given in millions.

Overall, it is visible that the highest working institution was manufacturing in the year of 1980 and the lowest sector was agriculture in 2020.

The trend of workers in manufacturing industries increased sharply from 15 million to 20 million in year 1960 and 1980 respectively, whereas afterwards it gradually declined in the following years and reached just below 15 millions in 2020. However, agriculture sector had around 6 million jobs in 1960 which later decreased to approxiamately 2.5 millions in 1980 and 2000. A strong fall in the digits of jobs was noticed in year 2020 for the same sector which was about 2 million.

The amount of jobs available in healthcare sector was about 2.5 million in 1960 which inclined to 5 million and 11 million in 1980 and 2000 respectively. In 2020 it was just above 15 million and was same as the retail sector. Jobs in retail sector increased from 5 million in 1960 following an increasing trend and was noticed to be 15 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main overall pattern: manufacturing peaks in 1980, while agriculture is the smallest sector by 2020, and you describe the broad changes in all four sectors. Most figures are close to the chart. However, some details are inaccurate: agriculture is about 3 million in both 1980 and 2000, rather than 2.5 million, and retail reaches about 16 million in 2020, not 15 million. The overview could also compare the sectors more fully, especially noting that retail and healthcare both finish at around 16 million and overtake manufacturing. Your account of retail is less developed than the other descriptions, so the response covers the task but not all key features with equal clarity.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure, moving from an introduction and overview to paragraphs describing the sector trends. Linking words such as “Overall,” “whereas,” and “However” help show contrasts, and the information is generally easy to follow. This meets the expected level of coherent organisation and shows some effective progression. To make the flow more flexible and precise, avoid relying on repeated time-based phrasing such as “in the year” and “in 2020,” and group related comparisons more deliberately. For example, retail and healthcare could be discussed together at the end because both rise substantially and finish at a similar level. The final sentence’s reference to retail’s “increasing trend” is also vague about its endpoint.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a reasonable range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “increased sharply,” “gradually declined,” and “strong fall,” so the main changes are communicated clearly. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “numerical data” and “following years.” However, some choices are unnatural or imprecise for this task: “working institution” does not mean an employment sector, and “inclined” is not the appropriate verb for a rising figure. “Digits of jobs” is also an awkward collocation. Spelling errors such as “approxiamately” reduce accuracy. Aim for standard chart language and precise collocations; this will make your descriptions sound more natural without requiring more complicated vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including contrast clauses with “whereas” and “However,” and most of the meaning remains clear. Some sentences are well controlled, such as the comparison between manufacturing’s rise and later decline. There are nevertheless some grammatical errors and awkward constructions. For example, “in years from 1960 to 2020” needs a more natural time expression, and “in year 1960 and 1980 respectively” is missing articles. Plural forms are inconsistent in “15 millions,” and the sentence beginning “Jobs in retail sector increased” has an agreement problem with the later phrase “and was noticed.” Review articles, plural nouns, and subject–verb agreement, while continuing to use varied sentence structures.

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