Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the employment status of four sectors (Manufacturing,Retail,Agriculture and Healthcare) of the US economy over the period of 1960 to 2020.

Overall,it is clearly evident that healthcare and Retail sectors were the highest employer with maximum number of job openings in 2020, whereas, Agriculture sector remained the lowest.

Looking into the details, Healthcare sector offered 2.5 millions jobs in 1960,gradually increased its number of jobs over all these years and reached to the highest level of 15.1 millions in 2020. Whereas,Manufacturing sector opened 15 million jobs in 1960, Peaked to 20 millions in 1980, signifciantly dropped to 13 millions in 2020.

In contrast, Agriculture and Retail sectors offered equal number of job openings at around 5.5 millions in 1960, number of jobs in retail sectors increased and reached to 15.1 millions in 2020 while agriculture sector observed a sharp decline to 3 millions in 1980, where the number remained steady with no change observed until 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main broad pattern: healthcare and retail rise, manufacturing peaks and then declines, and agriculture is the smallest sector by the end. You also include useful comparisons, such as manufacturing’s peak in 1980 and agriculture and retail starting at similar levels. However, some figures and trends are inaccurate: healthcare begins at about 2 million, not 2.5 million, and reaches about 16 million in 2020; agriculture falls to about 2 million by 2020, rather than remaining at 3 million. The overview also groups healthcare and retail as the highest employers in 2020 without noting that they are approximately tied. More precise reporting of the final values and the agriculture trend would make the key features clearer and more fully supported.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and two detail paragraphs that group the sectors for comparison. The progression from the broad summary to specific trends is easy to follow, and linking expressions such as “Overall,” “In contrast,” and “Whereas” help connect ideas. This shows a coherent arrangement, though some connections feel mechanical or unclear. For example, “Whereas” begins a new sentence after the healthcare figure, and the final sentence combines retail’s rise with agriculture’s decline in a long sequence. Use clearer sentence boundaries and more precise referencing, and organise each comparison so the reader can readily distinguish the two trends. This would make cohesion more flexible and less dependent on repeated contrast markers.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a suitable range of task-related vocabulary, including “gradually increased,” “peaked,” “decline,” and “remained steady,” so the main trends are generally understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “illustrates” and “highest level.” However, several choices are imprecise or unnatural for a graph description: “employment status” does not describe the number of jobs, and “job openings” suggests vacancies rather than total employment. “Offered” is also an awkward verb for sector employment figures. Spelling errors such as “signifciantly” and inconsistent capitalisation reduce accuracy. Prefer standard collocations such as “the number of jobs,” “employed,” and “rose to,” and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex forms, including clauses with “whereas” and “while,” and the overall meaning is usually clear. Some sentences are grammatically controlled, such as the statement that manufacturing peaked in 1980 before falling. However, errors in agreement, articles, number forms, and punctuation remain. For example, “Healthcare sector” needs an article, “2.5 millions jobs” should use a singular unit form, and “number of jobs in retail sectors increased” has an awkward article and plural pattern. Several sentences also run together after full stops or commas, as in “Overall,it” and the final long comparison. Use consistent sentence punctuation and check articles and singular/plural forms to improve accuracy while retaining your complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.