Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line chart display roughly the number of jobs in US from 1960 to 2020 in four sectores of the economy.

overall, manufacturing fluctuate before declling while retail and healthcare dispaly a major growth in every year. in contrast, agriculture shows a downward through out the period. In 2020, retail and healthcare had become the largest employment sectors, with approximately 16 millions jobs each.

In 1960, manufacturing was the leading sector, employing arround 15 million individuals. this figure peaks for 20 million in 1980 before falling to approximately 17 million and thirteen million prespectively in 2000 and 2020.

Retail employment steadily increase from 6 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020. Healthcare also experienced significant growth. starting at just 2 million jobs in 1960, to figure climbed to 5 million in 1980 and 11 million in 2000, before reaching roughly 16 million in 2020.

By comparison,agriculture declinind steadily from 6 million to 3 million in 1980 and remain same for the 2000 then fell further about 2 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response selects the main trends and supports them with relevant figures. It accurately identifies manufacturing as the leading sector in 1960, its peak of 20 million in 1980 and subsequent decline, as well as the strong growth in retail and healthcare and the fall in agriculture. The overview also highlights that retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million by 2020, a useful comparison. This gives the report a clear, well-supported account of the chart. To make the coverage more consistently precise, clarify that retail rose steadily across the period, while healthcare increased at each recorded point, and avoid the broad phrase “in every year,” since the chart only gives four dates. Overall, the key features are addressed and supported, with only minor scope for sharper qualification.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The information is arranged in a sensible sequence: an introduction and overview are followed by details about manufacturing and the growing sectors, then agriculture. This makes the main comparisons easy to follow, and phrases such as “In contrast” and “By comparison” help signal relationships between trends. The response therefore has a coherent overall structure. However, some links are mechanical or unclear, and punctuation sometimes interrupts the flow: “Healthcare also experienced significant growth. starting…” should be joined or correctly capitalised, while “then fell further about 2 million” leaves the relationship between the figures less smooth. The overview also groups retail and healthcare together, but the body could compare their different starting points more explicitly. More controlled sentence connections and clearer referencing would strengthen progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The response uses relevant vocabulary for describing a line graph, including “leading sector,” “peaks,” “steadily,” “significant growth,” and “declin[ing].” These choices communicate the broad trends and show some range beyond basic repetition. However, noticeable spelling and word-form errors reduce precision, including “sectores,” “declling,” “dispaly,” “prespectively,” and “declinind.” Some phrasing is also awkward or imprecise: “this figure peaks for 20 million” and “the figure climbed” would be more natural as “peaked at 20 million” and “the figure climbed.” “Every year” overstates what the chart shows, which reports four dates. Check spelling carefully and prioritise accurate collocations and precise trend language to make the vocabulary more dependable.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The report attempts a mixture of simple and more developed sentences, including a contrast in “In contrast, agriculture shows…” and a sequence of changes in the manufacturing and healthcare descriptions. Meaning is generally recoverable, but errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries are frequent enough to affect fluency. For example, “manufacturing fluctuate” needs a past-tense verb, “Retail employment steadily increase” needs “increased,” and “the figure peaks” should be “peaked” to match the period being described. The fragment “Healthcare also experienced significant growth. starting…” should be recast as one complete sentence. There are also missing or misplaced articles and prepositions in “fell further about 2 million.” Use consistent past tense, check subject–verb agreement, and proofread sentence boundaries.

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