Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrates the information about the amount of jobs in 4 different sectors of economy in US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall,manufacturing sector reached the peak and inclined drastically. Healthcare and Retail gradually increased their jobs overtime. Jobs in agriculture sector is always low and decresed overtime.

Initially, In 1960 Manufaturing sector has highest jobs with 15 million and the graph increased drastically to 20 million in 1980,from then the graph decreased gradually in 2000 and 2020 which is around 16 million and 14 million respectively.In contrast jobs in Agriculture sector is comapritively low in 1960 with around 5.2 million. overtime the jobs even decreased overtime from 1980 to 2020.

Initially, the jobs in Healthcare are drastically lower comapred to retail. The number of jobvs in these two sectors increased overtime from 1980 to 2000 ranging 5 million jobs in health care and 10 millions jobs in retail in 1980. retail has more than 5 million jobs in 2000 and health care eventually reacxhed retail in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing rises to a peak before declining, while healthcare and retail grow, and agriculture remains the smallest sector. Several figures are also reported accurately, including manufacturing at 15 million in 1960 and 20 million in 1980. However, the overview is imprecise: manufacturing did not simply “incline drastically” after reaching its peak; it declined, and the final values for retail and healthcare are both about 16 million. The agriculture description omits its approximate values and the fact that it falls from around 6 million to 2 million. The comparison of retail and healthcare is also unclear, especially the statement that retail “has more than 5 million jobs” in 2000. More precise comparisons and a clearer account of the endpoint trends would make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs. Grouping manufacturing with agriculture, then healthcare with retail, gives the reader a basic route through the data. However, progression within the paragraphs is uneven, and some links are repetitive or unclear. “Initially” is used to begin both detail paragraphs, while “overtime” is repeated and does not always show the relationship between figures. The sentence about retail in 2000 interrupts the comparison because it does not state the value clearly. Improve cohesion by organising each paragraph around a clear comparison and using accurate time links such as “by 2000” and “whereas.” Clearer sentence boundaries and punctuation would also help the information flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant chart vocabulary, including “sector,” “peak,” “decreased,” and “increased,” so the main trends are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or awkward for describing data. “Amount of jobs” is less suitable than “number of jobs,” and “inclined drastically” does not clearly express a decline. There are also noticeable spelling errors, such as “Manufaturing,” “comapritively,” and “reacxhed,” alongside repeated use of “overtime” where “over time” is intended. These errors sometimes make the intended comparison harder to follow. Aim for precise trend verbs and check spelling and collocations carefully when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including comparisons introduced by “In contrast,” but control is inconsistent. Errors in agreement and verb forms appear in phrases such as “Jobs in agriculture sector is always low and decresed” and “Manufacturing sector has highest jobs.” Articles and sentence punctuation are also often missing or misplaced, as in “Initially, In 1960 Manufaturing sector…” and the long sentence beginning “the graph increased drastically to 20 million in 1980,from then…”. These problems make some relationships between dates and figures difficult to read. Use complete sentences with consistent past-tense reporting, and separate linked trends with full stops or carefully formed clauses.

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