Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrate the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, all the four sectors are fluctuated year by year, some sectors are erarlier rising and then fall. On the other hand, some some rise with big jump.

Firstly, we see the manufacturing and retail sector. The manufacturing sector start with 15 millions jobs, but 1960 to 1980 they big jump of jobs around 20 million. Although this a biigest jump, after this jump they fall, and they do not stop untill below the start level. Another sector is retail they strat with 5 millions above jobs, but later on they rise again and again for next 60 years.

Secondly, we disscuss remianing sectors like agriculture and healthcare. Agriculture start with same as above retail sector, but they do not hold properly and they start to end face falling.The healthcare sector are start the minimum jobs below 5 millions, but later they rise without any face falling. They grow 1960 to still 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the four sectors and describe several key directions: manufacturing rises to a peak before declining, retail and healthcare increase, and agriculture falls. The manufacturing figures are broadly accurate, including the peak of about 20 million and the later drop below its starting level. However, some comparisons are unclear or inaccurate: retail begins at about 6 million, not “5 millions above jobs,” and it rises to around 16 million rather than simply rising “again and again.” The overview is also vague (“all the four sectors are fluctuated”) and does not highlight that retail and healthcare finish jointly highest, while agriculture is lowest. Develop these comparisons and report the main stages more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs grouped by sectors. “Firstly” and “Secondly” help signal the organisation, and the reader can generally follow which sectors are being discussed. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow because several ideas are joined loosely, as in the manufacturing description, and the overview does not clearly preview the main contrasts. Some linking phrases are mechanical or confusing, including “On the other hand” and “like agriculture and healthcare.” Use clearer topic sentences and connect each figure to the trend it illustrates; also make references such as “they” unambiguous by naming the sector.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “sector,” “jobs,” “rise,” “fall,” and “minimum,” so the topic is usually understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the description awkward: “big jump of jobs,” “do not hold properly,” and “end face falling” do not express the trends clearly. Spelling errors such as “eararlier,” “biigest,” “untill,” and “disscuss” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, conventional language for describing data, such as “increased,” “peaked,” “declined,” and “remained stable.” Check spelling and choose phrases that describe the direction and scale of change directly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including contrast with “Although” and time clauses such as “1960 to 1980.” Some sentence meanings remain understandable, but errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction are persistent. For example, “The graph illustrate” needs subject–verb agreement, while “The manufacturing sector start” and “The healthcare sector are start” use incorrect verb forms. Phrases such as “they big jump” and “they start to end face falling” also lack a workable grammatical structure. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and build sentences around a clear subject and verb, for example, “Manufacturing rose to 20 million in 1980 before declining.”

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