Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustartes the availability of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the United States from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, manufacturing industry showed the highest number of jobs throughout given period except in the last year when retail and healthcare departments were providing highest number of jobs. In contrast, agricultural sectors showed the least number of jobs.

In 1960, the available jobs in manufacturing industry was 15 million before reaching a peak of 20 million in 1980. In 2000, the figure decreased to around 17 million and further 12 million in 2020. In contrast, agriculatuiral sector had 6 million jobs in 1960 which was further decreased to around 3 million throughtout the period till 2020.

In 1960, Reatil and agricutural department had about 3million and 6 million number of jobs respectively. In 1980 and 2000, these figures increased to arond 10 to 15 million in retail sector and 5 million to almost 12 milliion in healthcare deaprtment. In 2020, both sectors were the highest providing jobs upto 16 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing rises to a peak before declining, while agriculture falls, and healthcare and retail grow. The overview also notes that manufacturing is no longer the leading sector by 2020. However, some details are inaccurate or unclear. Agriculture falls to about 2 million in 2020, not 3 million throughout the period, and healthcare starts at 2 million in 1960, not 3 million; the opening comparison reverses retail and agriculture. The final-year leaders are tied at about 16 million, rather than simply described as both “highest.” The response covers the main trends, but these misread figures and the limited comparison of the changing sector rankings keep the account only partially precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs. Grouping manufacturing with agriculture, then discussing retail and healthcare, gives the reader a basic route through the data. However, progression within the final paragraph is difficult to follow: it begins with 1960 figures, then combines the 1980 and 2000 values in a way that obscures which figure belongs to which year. The repeated opening “In 1960” also makes the organisation feel less controlled, and phrases such as “these figures” have unclear references. Use one paragraph for the declining series and another for the growing series, and report each year in sequence with clear links between comparisons.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant chart vocabulary, including “peak,” “decreased,” “figure,” and “throughout,” and the reader can generally understand the trends you intend to describe. However, several word choices and collocations are awkward or imprecise, such as “availability of jobs,” “departments were providing highest number of jobs,” and “number of jobs in … sector.” Spelling errors are also noticeable, including “illustartes,” “agriculatuiral,” “Reatil,” and “milliion.” These slips reduce the accuracy and polish of the description, even where the intended meaning is recoverable. Prefer standard data-reporting phrases such as “the number of jobs,” “employment in the sector,” and “stood at,” and proofread sector names and key terms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast with “In contrast” and a time clause beginning “before reaching.” However, errors in sentence structure and agreement occur often enough to make some statements awkward. For example, “the available jobs … was 15 million” has a plural subject with a singular verb, while “further 12 million” is missing a grammatical link such as “fell further to.” The phrase “which was further decreased” is also an awkward passive construction for describing a trend. Articles and number patterns are inconsistent, as in “throughout given period.” Build clearer sentences with accurate subjects and verbs, for example, “The figure fell to 13 million by 2020,” and check agreement and articles when editing.

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