Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The following line graph represents the number of jobs in four various sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, heath care and retail sectors can be seen rising on the end of the year 2020, whereas agricultural falls downward. Manfacturing job rised and decreased steadly.

Manufacturing sector started with the highest jobs in million with 15 million in thye year 1960 whereas heathcare initially was lowest of all the job sectore in US between 0 to 5 million. Agricultural and Retail, both started above 5 million. After that, manufacturing job gradually increased and reached its peak at 20 million in the year 1980 then levelled off around 10 million by the end of the year. Heathcare and retail both showed positive change moving to 15 million by 2020 being the highest of the economy. At the end of the year, agricultural fell steadily between 1 to 5 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing rises before declining, healthcare and retail grow, and agriculture falls. You also include useful starting and peak figures, such as manufacturing at 15 million in 1960 and 20 million in 1980. However, some key details are unclear or inaccurate. Manufacturing ends at about 13 million, not “around 10 million,” and retail and healthcare reach about 16 million in 2020, rather than both moving to 15 million. The overview’s phrase “rising on the end” does not clearly describe the trends, and the account gives little comparison of how retail and healthcare change at different rates. More precise end-point figures and a clearer overview would make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph with figures and trends. Its information is generally understandable, and sequencing phrases such as “After that” and “At the end” help guide the reader. However, the overview is vague, and the final paragraph moves between sectors without a consistently clear comparison. For example, the sentence about healthcare and retail combines their growth but does not distinguish healthcare’s stronger rise from retail’s more gradual increase. Some references, including “on the end of the year 2020,” are also unclear. Grouping the two growing sectors together while explicitly contrasting their trajectories with manufacturing and agriculture would improve progression and cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant task vocabulary, including “peak,” “levelled off,” “gradually increased,” and “steadily,” showing an adequate range for describing a graph. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “rising on the end,” “falls downward,” and “positive change moving to 15 million.” Spelling errors in “heath care,” “Manfacturing,” “thye,” and “sectore” also reduce accuracy. In addition, “job” is repeated where “employment” or “number of jobs” would be more natural. Aim for precise trend language and check spelling: for example, say that a sector “rose to” a figure or “declined to” a level, rather than using vague or redundant phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex forms, including the contrast introduced by “whereas” and the time clause “After that, manufacturing job gradually increased…”. The main meaning is usually recoverable, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “Manufacturing job rised” has an incorrect verb form and lacks plural agreement; “healthcare initially was lowest” needs a clearer construction such as “healthcare initially had the fewest jobs”; and “both started above 5 million” does not accurately express the intended comparison. Articles and sentence structure are also awkward in phrases such as “at the end of the year.” Use consistent past-tense forms for the historical data, check singular/plural agreement, and build comparisons with complete, clearly structured clauses.

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