Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph shows that the number of jobs in four sectors economy in the US.This indicates between 1960 to 2020.

To start with the most extended job in 2020 is Healthcare department.And the lowest from this four is in Agricultural place.If we talk about in 1960 So,there is high places in Manufacturing.but after years it went down.Moreover at the same time there are less jobs in Healthcare and now in 2020 ,It goes highest in rest of it.From all this four years two sectors are extended up and other two are lesser than usual value.The retail and Healthcare departments are same in 2020 .The Manufacturing and agricultural field jobs are went down than past years.Above all Manufacturing department is at on peak at 1980.It is highest in all time like 20 millions jobs are there in that time.And it is one of highest thing that happened in past four years.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify several important features: manufacturing is highest in 1980 at about 20 million, agriculture declines overall, and healthcare rises to become one of the largest sectors by 2020. These observations are broadly consistent with the graph. However, the overview is unclear and sometimes inaccurate: saying “two sectors are extended up and other two are lesser” does not clearly distinguish the overall rises in retail and healthcare from the declines in manufacturing and agriculture. You also say healthcare is “the most extended” in 2020, although it is level with retail at about 16 million. A clearer summary of the main trends and more precise comparisons would make the report more complete and developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response includes relevant points and some sequencing phrases, such as “To start with,” “Moreover,” and “Above all.” However, the ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs or a consistent progression from an overview to supporting details. Several points are repeated, particularly the rise of healthcare and the peak in manufacturing, while the phrase “From all this four years” makes the relationship between the trends difficult to follow. Connections such as “after years” and “at the same time” do not always show the intended time or contrast clearly. Group the rising sectors together and the declining sectors together, and use precise links to guide the reader through the comparisons.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “sectors,” “Manufacturing,” “Retail,” and “jobs,” so the subject is generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and several expressions are unnatural or imprecise, such as “most extended job,” “Agricultural place,” and “highest in rest of it.” These choices sometimes make the intended comparison unclear. “Went down” communicates a basic decline, but more precise trend language would help describe the data. Aim to use standard collocations for charts, such as “employment in healthcare,” “the lowest figure,” and “rose steadily,” and avoid calling a sector a “department” or “place.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts a few longer sentences, but most structures are simple or incomplete, and errors frequently affect clarity. For example, “The line graph shows that the number of jobs … in the US” lacks a complete, well-formed opening, while “The Manufacturing and agricultural field jobs are went down” combines incompatible verb forms. There are also recurring problems with articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries, as in “the lowest from this four” and “Moreover at the same time there are less jobs.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, with several sentences joined or separated awkwardly. Practise accurate past-tense descriptions and complete comparison sentences before adding more complex structures.

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