Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, healthcare and retail jobs soared while manufacturing and agriculture jobs plummeted. The manufacturing job line graph touched its peak vefore experiencing a sharp decline.

In 1960, there were 15 jobs in millions. By 1980, it touched the peak of the line graph of 20 jobs in millions despite experiencing a sharp decline of 17 in 2000 and 13 in 2020. Retail jobs started from 5 in 1960 and soared to 10 in 1980 and 15 in 2000 before touching the highest of 16 in 2020. Healthcare jobs also surged from 3 in 1960 to 5 in 1980 and then sharply increased to 11 in 2000 and 16 in 2020. In contrast, agricultural job declined from 6 in 1960 to 4 in 1980 followed by 4 in 2000 and 3 in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the main contrast between rising healthcare and retail employment and falling agriculture, and you report several relevant figures. However, the overview is not fully accurate: manufacturing rose to a peak before declining, rather than simply being grouped with agriculture as a sector that “plummeted.” Some figures are also misreported: manufacturing had 15 million jobs in 1960, not “15 jobs in millions,” while healthcare began at about 2 million and agriculture fell from 6 to about 3 by 1980, not 4. The response is 135 words, below the required 150, so the account is underdeveloped. Include a clearer overview and accurate units and comparisons to address the task more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph of figures. The sequence from 1960 through 2020 is generally easy to follow, and “In contrast” appropriately signals the agricultural trend. However, the overview and details do not always connect clearly: manufacturing is described as declining in the overview, although the figures show an initial rise to a peak in 1980. The long final paragraph also places all four sectors together, making comparisons harder to see. Grouping manufacturing with agriculture as declining after their respective peaks, and retail with healthcare as rising overall, would create clearer progression. Some phrasing, such as “touched the peak of the line graph,” also interrupts the flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of trend vocabulary, including “soared,” “plummeted,” “surged,” “decline,” and “in contrast,” which helps communicate changes. However, some choices are imprecise or repetitive for describing a line graph. “Touched the peak of the line graph” is an awkward way to report a maximum, and “sharp decline” is used for manufacturing even though the series first rises. “Jobs in millions” is also not a natural way to express the figures; use “million jobs” or “employment stood at.” The spelling error “vefore” is noticeable. More precise, varied terms such as “peaked at,” “fell to,” and “increased steadily” would make the account clearer and more appropriately academic.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You produce several understandable sentences and use some complex structures, including “By 1980 … despite experiencing…” and “before touching the highest…”. However, the range is limited, with many sentences following a similar pattern of subject, trend verb, and figures. Some grammatical choices make relationships unclear: in “despite experiencing a sharp decline of 17 in 2000,” the construction does not clearly show that the figure fell to 17 million. The phrase “agricultural job declined” also has a singular noun where a plural form is needed, and “the highest of 16” lacks a clear grammatical complement. Aim for accurate comparisons such as “Manufacturing employment peaked at 20 million in 1980, then fell to 17 million in 2000.” This would improve both sentence control and clarity.

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