Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given graph actually is a comparative information about the number of employment in four different sectors of the economy in the US, during 1960 to 2020.

There are 4 different sectors, manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare.

From 1960 onwords till 2020 the employment rate in healthcare sector is in growing trend, from 2 millions to 15 millions, while the agriculture sector the employment rate from 1960 onwords to 2020 is in down trend, from 5 millions towords 3-2 millions, and the retail sector can be seen in a growing trend from 5 millions to 16 millions in this period fron 1960 to 2020, while the manufacturing sector is in diwn trend overall, but from 1960 to 1980 it shown a growing trend and reached from 15 millions to 20 millions, but from 1980 to 2020 it gradually showing down trend and reached 13 millions.

So this is the overall summary of the given graph.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify all four sectors and describe their broad directions, including manufacturing’s rise to a peak in 1980 followed by decline. However, the response is mainly a sequence of trend descriptions rather than a well-selected summary with a clear overview of the most important comparisons. Some figures are inaccurate: agriculture begins at about 6 million, not 5 million, and healthcare ends at about 16 million, rather than 15 million. The overview also misses the key comparison that retail and healthcare both finish at roughly 16 million, while agriculture is by far the smallest sector. To strengthen the response, state these main features clearly, then support them with accurate figures and comparisons across the period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response follows a generally understandable order: it introduces the graph, names the sectors, and then describes their trends. Linking words such as “while” and “but” help show contrasts, and the manufacturing description has a clear sequence from 1960 to 1980 and then to 2020. However, most of the information is packed into one long paragraph and one extended sentence, so the progression is difficult to follow. The opening list and closing sentence (“So this is the overall summary”) add little analytical value. Use separate paragraphs for an overview and the detailed comparisons, and divide the trend descriptions into shorter sentences. This would make the organisation clearer and reduce repetitive linking.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “sectors,” “employment,” “growing trend,” and “down trend,” so the reader can identify the subject and general movements. However, the range is limited and several expressions are unnatural or imprecise, such as “comparative information,” “employment rate” for job numbers, and “in growing trend.” Repetition of “trend” and “from … to” also makes the account less flexible. There are noticeable spelling errors, including “onwords,” “towords,” “fron,” and “diwn,” which reduce accuracy and polish. Aim for concise chart language such as “the number of jobs,” “rose steadily,” “declined,” and “reached a peak,” while checking spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to connect several ideas in complex sentences, particularly when contrasting the sectors, and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, the response relies heavily on long, loosely joined clauses, and errors occur frequently in sentence construction and verb forms. For example, “while the agriculture sector the employment rate…” lacks a complete grammatical structure, and “from 1980 to 2020 it gradually showing down trend” has an incorrect verb form. The opening phrase “The given graph actually is…” also has awkward word order. Use a clearer mix of short and complex sentences, with a subject and finite verb in each clause; for example, “Agricultural employment fell from about 6 million to 2 million.” Check articles, tense consistency, and punctuation when joining clauses.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.