Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line chart shows the number of jobs in the four US economic sectors namely, manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare, between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the most noticeable feature is that the retail and agriculture sector followed and upward trend while manufacturing, despite being at the highest position, declined significantly over the years. The healthcare sectore became the highest grown sector over the years.

Regarding the highest figures, the manufacturing sector accounted for 15 million jobs in 1960. Although, it reached 20 millions in 1980, it witnessed a fall to around 13 million by the year 2020. Similar downward trend was seen for the agriculture sector which declined from 6 millions in 1960 to only 2.5% by 2020.

In comaprison, despite being the smallest job sector, the heathcare department experienced a substantial increase from 2 millions in 1960 to around 16 million in 2020 and became the largest grown sector over the years followed by the retail sector that goes likewise from 6 millions to 16 million jobs respectively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the four sectors and provide a clear overall summary of contrasting trends, including manufacturing’s rise and subsequent decline and healthcare’s strong growth. Several key figures are also reported accurately, such as manufacturing reaching 20 million in 1980 and healthcare rising to about 16 million by 2020. However, the overview contains a significant misreading: agriculture did not follow an upward trend; it fell overall from 6 million to about 2 million. The comparison that healthcare became the “highest grown sector” is also unclear, since retail and healthcare both reached roughly 16 million in 2020. To make the account more complete and precise, describe retail’s steady rise and clarify the final ranking, while checking that each trend in the overview matches the data.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs grouping the main figures. The progression from manufacturing and agriculture to healthcare and retail is generally easy to follow, and phrases such as “Regarding” and “In comparison” signal shifts between points. This meets the lower-band expectation of an overall coherent arrangement and shows some stronger control through paragraphing. However, the links are occasionally mechanical or unclear. “The retail and agriculture sector followed and upward trend” makes the comparison difficult to interpret, while “goes likewise” does not clearly connect the retail figures to the preceding healthcare figures. Use more precise transitions and ensure each paragraph groups related trends consistently.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “accounted for,” “witnessed a fall,” “substantial increase,” and “declined.” These choices help describe changes rather than simply listing figures, and the meaning is generally clear. There are, however, some inaccurate or awkward word choices and spelling errors that limit precision. “Highest grown sector” is not a natural way to describe the largest increase, and “department” is less suitable than “sector” for an economic category. “2.5%” also uses the wrong unit for a number of jobs, and “comaprison,” “heathcare,” and “sectore” are misspelled. Aim for consistent, accurate terms such as “number of jobs,” “employment,” and “rose steadily.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a concession clause in “Although, it reached 20 millions in 1980…” and a relative clause in “the retail sector that goes likewise…”. Most sentences remain understandable, so errors rarely prevent communication. Some grammatical inaccuracies are nevertheless noticeable. The phrase “Although, it reached” should not have a comma after “Although” in this construction, and “the retail and agriculture sector” has a number-agreement problem when referring to two sectors. There are also inconsistent verb forms in “the retail sector that goes likewise,” where past-tense reporting is needed. Check agreement, tense consistency, and punctuation around introductory clauses to improve control.

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