Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph illustrates about kind's of job in 4 different sectors in united states between [redacted phone]. There is quite difference in each and every year and probably graph is ascending and descending. Maximum in Manfacturing sector individuals, are achieving higher jobs around 20 millions and lowest is Agriculture where people are only getting 3-4 millions.

Around, in year 1960 Retail and Agriculture are having same number of jobs within 6 million bracket. Year 1980 Manufacturing is having highest, number of jobs and Healthcare sector was third one. Retail is also progressing in year 1980 and year 2000 is turning point for Manufacturing beacuse number of jobs start decreasing. While parallel Retail number of jobs start ascending above 15 millions.

The ending, Year 2020 where Healthcare is the lowest and other two sectors Retail and Healthcare were corresponding to each other with number jobs around 16 millions. Second one is Manufacturing which start decreasing around 13.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify several relevant features, including manufacturing’s peak at about 20 million in 1980, its later decline, and the growth of retail and healthcare. However, the overview is unclear and partly inaccurate: saying manufacturing has the maximum and agriculture the minimum does not capture how the leading sector changes, and the final sentence incorrectly calls healthcare “the lowest” in 2020, when it is joint highest with retail at around 16 million. Agriculture also falls to about 2 million, rather than remaining at 3–4 million. To strengthen the response, give a clear overview of the contrasting trends and accurately compare the sectors at the beginning and end.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response is divided into paragraphs and generally follows the timeline from 1960 through 2020, which gives the reader some structure. However, progression is not consistently clear: the opening says the graph is “ascending and descending” without specifying which sectors, and the final paragraph’s statement that healthcare is lowest conflicts with the comparison that follows. Linking phrases such as “Around, in year 1960” and “The ending” are awkward, while repeated references to years make the account feel list-like. Organise the report around an overview followed by clear comparisons of the main trends, and use time markers and contrast words more accurately.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “sector,” “decreasing,” “ascending,” and “turning point,” so the reader can recognise the general subject and trends. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the meaning unclear, such as “about kind’s of job,” “individuals, are achieving higher jobs,” and “were corresponding to each other.” There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “Manfacturing” and “beacuse.” Choose precise terms for employment figures and trends, and check spelling and natural word combinations. For example, describe the number of jobs as “employment” or “job numbers,” rather than saying people are “achieving higher jobs.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences, for example when describing manufacturing’s decline alongside retail’s rise, but control is inconsistent and the range of sentence structures is limited. Errors in articles, agreement, and sentence construction occur in phrases such as “in united states,” “Retail and Agriculture are having same number,” and “number of jobs start decreasing.” Punctuation also disrupts meaning in “Maximum in Manfacturing sector individuals, are achieving higher jobs.” Use straightforward, complete sentences with consistent past-tense reporting, and check subject–verb agreement and article use. More accurate sentence patterns would make the comparisons easier to follow.

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