Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The linear representation illustrates the information related to the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

In 1960, the number for manufacturing job was 15 million. Moreover, there was a steady rise of 5 million in 1980. However, it decreased sharply to 7million in 2020. Moreover, in 1960, the number for retail job was 6 million. Furthermore, there was a steady rise of 4 million in 1980. Moreover, it increased steadily to 15 million in 2000. But, it was slowly increased to the following years.

In 1960, the number for healthcare job was nearly 3 million. there had been a significant incline to 5 million in 1980. Moreover, it had increased sudden in 2000. However, it had a steady rise of 5 million in 2020. In 1960, the number for agriculture job was nearly 5 million. Moreover, there was a steady drop of 4 million in 1980. However, it levelled off till 1980 to 2000. Moreover, it decreased steady to nearly 3 million in 2020.

Overall, manufacturing highest job 20 million. However, it was lowest to around 14 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify all four sectors and include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing at 15 million in 1960 and retail at 6 million. However, the account is only partially accurate and the overview does not clearly summarise the main trends. Manufacturing peaked at 20 million in 1980, then fell to about 13 million by 2020—not 7 million. Retail rose to 16 million by 2020, while healthcare also reached about 16 million; the response does not clearly report these final values. Agriculture began at about 6 million, rather than 5, and ended near 2 million, not 3. The overview incorrectly calls manufacturing the highest in general, without specifying the year. Select the key overall patterns and check each figure against the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic sequence, moving through manufacturing, retail, healthcare and agriculture, and it uses paragraph breaks to separate the introduction, details and overview. However, the information is not arranged into a clear comparison of the sectors, and the final overview is too brief to bring the main trends together. Linking words such as “Moreover,” “However,” and “Furthermore” recur mechanically, sometimes where no contrast or addition is needed. For example, repeated “Moreover” sentences make the manufacturing and retail descriptions feel like lists rather than a connected account. Group sectors with similar trends or compare their figures directly, and use fewer, more precise transitions to make the progression easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “steady rise,” “decreased,” “levelled off,” and “increased,” so the reader can generally understand the intended trends. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive. “The linear representation” is an awkward way to introduce a line graph, while “number for manufacturing job” and “manufacturing highest job” are not natural expressions. The phrase “increased sudden” also uses the wrong form, and “slowly increased” does not clearly describe the small rise in retail. Use precise terms such as “number of jobs,” “peaked at,” “fell to,” and “remained stable,” while varying trend language appropriately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple statements and longer sentences, and many figures are presented in a recognisable subject–verb pattern. However, grammatical errors are frequent, and attempts at more complex phrasing are often faulty. Examples include “the number for manufacturing job was,” which has problems with articles and singular/plural agreement, and “there had been a significant incline,” where the tense does not fit the chart description. In “it had increased sudden,” the adverb form is incorrect; “there was a steady drop of 4 million” also does not clearly express the resulting figure. Capitalisation after full stops and spacing around numbers are inconsistent. Practise accurate past-simple sentences and check articles, agreement, verb forms and punctuation.

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