Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph tracts the variation in the number jobs over the years in four sectors of economy mainly named as Manufacturing,Retail,Agriculture and Healthcare.The graph represents the jobs in millions and recorded variotion from 1960s-2020. Manufacturing has most number of jobs in 1960s where as healthcare and retail has more job recorded in year 2020.

1980s recorded to be the year offering highest number of jobs of manufacturing among all the sectors whereas 1960s and 2020s both recorded to be the lowest job offering in healthcare and agriculture sector,respectively.For Manufacturing,we can see a raise in job vacancies in 1980s from 1960s but from 1980s we can see a decline in number of jobs available.Furthermore,there is decline in number of jobs available in agriculture sector till 1980s.Between 1980 and 2000,there is no variation in job availability and numbers remained constant.Ultimately after 2000,there is decline in job numbers.For retail and healthcare,graph shows a similar pattern over the years i.e. both sectors have raised number of job vaccancies.

This rise and fall recorded in the number of jobs over the years states the shift of economy dependancy from manufacturing to retail and healthcare which is mainly because of advanced technology.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify several important patterns: manufacturing peaks in 1980 before declining, agriculture falls overall, and retail and healthcare rise. The overview also recognises the shift in which sectors employ more people by 2020. However, some comparisons are unclear or inaccurate. In 2020, retail and healthcare are tied at about 16 million, rather than simply having “more job” without specifying the comparison; manufacturing still has about 13 million. The claim that 1960 and 2020 were the lowest years for healthcare and agriculture, respectively, is also imprecise: healthcare is lowest in 1960, while agriculture reaches its lowest point in 2020. The final explanation about technology and economic dependence is not shown by the graph. More precise comparisons and a fuller account of the main figures would strengthen the report.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction and overview are followed by details about the sectors and a concluding comment. Sequencing is generally understandable, and connectors such as “Furthermore,” “Between 1980 and 2000,” and “Ultimately” help guide the reader. However, the overview is combined with the introduction, and the body moves between sectors without a consistently clear comparison. The phrase “For retail and healthcare” introduces a useful grouping, but the shared upward trend is not supported with figures or distinctions between their rates of growth. Some linking phrases, especially “This rise and fall,” refer vaguely to earlier information. Organising the body into clearer comparisons—declining sectors and rising sectors—and using more precise references would make progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant task vocabulary, including “variation,” “decline,” “constant,” and “job vacancies,” and you attempt to describe trends rather than merely list figures. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “tracts the variation,” “highest number of jobs,” and “job offering.” Spelling errors, including “variotion,” “vaccancies,” and “dependancy,” also reduce accuracy. Repetition of “number of jobs” and “we can see” limits flexibility, while “shift of economy dependancy” is an awkward way to interpret the data. Aim for precise reporting verbs and collocations, such as “the graph shows,” “employment peaked,” and “the number of jobs remained stable.” This would make the vocabulary more natural and exact.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses with “whereas,” “but,” and “which,” and the main trends are usually understandable. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with articles, agreement, and sentence construction. For example, “the number jobs” needs an article and “of,” while “healthcare and retail has more job” has agreement and plural errors. “There is decline” also needs an article, and “both sectors have raised number” uses an incorrect verb pattern and lacks an article. Punctuation and spacing around commas are inconsistent, and several long sentences would be clearer if divided. Review article use, subject–verb agreement, and plural forms, while retaining your attempts at varied sentence structures.

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