Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line graph illustrates, the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it can be seen that all the figures for each sectores had a fluctuated trends. Manufacturing and agricultural departments had a decreasing figure over a particular time period, while retail and healthcare sectors showed an increasing number of jobs.Both retail and healthcare produced highest job oppertunities, whereas agriculture had the lowest contribution.

According to the line graph, in 1960, opportunities produced by manufacturing department was almost 15 million, which was the highest number of jobs at that time, while over 6 million jobs were available in agriculture sector. Later in 1980 manufacturing jobs increased to 20 million and then got a decreased trend whhich stood at 16 million in 2000. In 1980, agriculture stood at 4 million and remained constant until 2000. Both production and agriculture the got a decline to 14 million and 3 million respectively by the end of 2020

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the broad contrast between declining manufacturing and agriculture and growing retail and healthcare, and you report several relevant figures. However, the response is incomplete: it gives no account of retail or healthcare data beyond the overview, so important trends and the final comparison are not supported. Some details are also inaccurate or unclear: agriculture is about 6 million in 1960, not “over 6 million,” and about 2 million in 2020, rather than 3 million. The overview’s claim that all sectors fluctuated is imprecise, since agriculture generally declined and healthcare rose steadily. The response is 148 words, below the 150-word minimum. Develop the missing series and ensure the overview reflects the main patterns accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and a detail paragraph, and it uses sequencing phrases such as “Overall,” “Later” and “by the end of 2020.” These help the reader follow the broad timeline. However, progression is limited because the detail paragraph covers manufacturing and agriculture only, leaving the other two sectors unreported. Some links are awkward or unclear, particularly “In 1980, agriculture stood at 4 million and remained constant until 2000” and “Both production and agriculture the got a decline.” The final sentence also ends the report without a clear concluding comparison. Organise the details into a clearer sequence, grouping comparable trends and using accurate references to each sector.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “increasing,” “decreasing,” “remained constant” and “contribution,” and the reader can generally understand the intended trends. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes parts of the report awkward. “Job opportunities” does not precisely describe the number of jobs shown, while “production” is an unclear substitute for manufacturing. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “oppertunities” and “whhich,” and “sectors” is misspelled as “sectores.” Prefer precise terms such as “employment” or “jobs,” and use the sector names consistently. Check spelling carefully and avoid using elaborate phrases when a direct description of the data is clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including a comparison with “while” and a time sequence using “which.” Meaning is usually recoverable, but errors in sentence construction, agreement and punctuation occur often enough to make some passages difficult to read. For example, “the number of jobs …” is incorrectly separated from “illustrates” by a comma, and “opportunities produced by manufacturing department was” has faulty agreement and article use. The phrase “Both production and agriculture the got a decline” is also structurally unclear, while spacing and punctuation are inconsistent. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement and articles. A wider range of structures will be more effective when these basic patterns are controlled.

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