Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates information about two number of jobs such as manufacturing, retal, agriculture and healthcare in four sectors of the economy in the America between 1960 to 2020.
Overall, it is clear that the numbers of jobs healthcare and retail increased while the agriculture decreased. Moreover the manufacturing job rose to its peak and then decreased.
In 1960, the manufacturing jobs was extremely popular in the US counted 15million, which increased to 20 million in 1980. Then it decreased from 20 million to about 12.5 million in 1980 and 2020. On the other hand healthcare jobs which was lowest at the start about 2 millions in 1960 and sharply Rose to about 15 million in 2020.
In contrast, the number of retail jobs were increased dramatically from 5.2 millions to 15 million in 1960 and 2020. Finally the number of agriculture reduced to 2.5 million in 1980 and stayed upto 2000 and decreased significantly in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You identify the main broad trends: healthcare and retail rise, agriculture declines, and manufacturing peaks before falling. You also include several figures, such as manufacturing at 15 million in 1960 and 20 million in 1980. However, some details are inaccurate or unclear: manufacturing falls to about 17 million in 2000, not 12.5 million, and retail rises from about 6 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020, rather than ending at 15 million. The healthcare figure at the end is also about 16 million. The overview is relevant but does not mention that retail and healthcare finish level. More accurate comparisons and clearer coverage of the intermediate years would make the summary more complete.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and paragraphs giving details. The overview helps the reader understand the main trends, and phrases such as “On the other hand” and “In contrast” signal comparisons. However, progression within the detail paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow. For example, the manufacturing sentence gives 1980 and 2020 figures but then refers to a fall “in 1980 and 2020,” making the sequence unclear. The final paragraph also moves from retail to agriculture without a clear comparison or transition. Use a consistent chronological order and group related series more deliberately; this would make the organisation clearer and reduce reliance on basic linking phrases.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “increased,” “decreased,” “peak,” and “sharply,” so the main message is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several choices or forms are inaccurate: “two number of jobs” is unclear, “extremely popular” is not a suitable description of employment figures, and “stayed upto” is imprecise. There are also spelling errors such as “retal,” and inconsistent forms such as “healthcare jobs” and “manufacturing job.” Aim for precise chart language and accurate collocations, for example “the number of jobs,” “reached a peak,” and “remained stable.” This would make the account more natural and exact.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrastive construction beginning “On the other hand,” and an overview with “while.” However, grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes make relationships between figures hard to interpret. Examples include “the manufacturing jobs was,” “healthcare jobs which was lowest,” and “the number of retail jobs were increased”; these show problems with agreement and verb construction. The phrase “from 20 million to about 12.5 million in 1980 and 2020” also has an unclear time relationship. Articles, plurals and tense patterns need more consistent control. Practise building accurate comparison sentences, checking subject–verb agreement, and using past-tense verbs consistently when reporting the historical data.
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