Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the US economy between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the graph shows the number of jobs in four sectors, including manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare, increasing and decreasing over the years.

There are 15% of people worked in manufacturing in 1960, and this number increased significantly in 1980 and goes to 20%. In retail, there were only 6% in 1960 but in 1980 it rose to 10%; in healthcare, it rose from 2% to 5% in 1980, but in agriculture, there were 6% of people in this job, and it declined to 3% in 1980.

On the other hand, jobs in the manufacturing industry declined; in 2000 it came to 17%, and in 2020 it declined to 13%. Meanwhile, in retail, the numbers increased in 2000 and they went to 15% and then 17% in 2020. In agriculture, the numbers remain same in 2000 but declined in 2020. In healthcare, numbers are goes up and in 2000 it rose to 12% and in 2020 it increased to 17%.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify all four sectors and report several key movements, including manufacturing peaking at 20 in 1980 before falling, and agriculture declining overall. However, the overview is too general: saying the sectors were “increasing and decreasing” does not highlight the main contrast that manufacturing and agriculture fell after their earlier levels, while retail and healthcare rose substantially. Some figures are also inaccurate: the chart gives jobs in millions, not percentages; retail reaches about 16 million, not 17, and healthcare is about 11 million in 2000 and 16 million in 2020, rather than 12 and 17. Agriculture remains around 3 million in 2000 and falls to 2 million. A clearer overview and more accurate reporting would strengthen coverage.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear basic structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs covering earlier and later years. The sequence from 1960 and 1980 to 2000 and 2020 is easy to follow, and transitions such as “Meanwhile” and “On the other hand” help signal comparisons. However, the overview repeats the introduction rather than guiding the reader towards the main trends. Some links are not fully logical: “On the other hand” introduces a time shift rather than a clear contrast, and the final paragraph moves between sectors without consistently grouping related trends. Organise the body around rising sectors and declining sectors, or compare all four at each time point, and use transitions that accurately express those relationships.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of trend vocabulary, including “increased significantly,” “declined,” “rose,” and “remain same,” so the main movements are generally understandable. However, several choices are repetitive or imprecise, and the repeated phrase “the numbers” does not specify whether you mean jobs or employment. “There are 15% of people” is also an unsuitable way to describe the chart, which reports job totals in millions rather than percentages. Some collocations and forms are awkward, such as “it came to 17%” and “numbers are goes up.” Use precise terms such as “employment,” “job numbers,” “reached,” and “stood at,” while keeping the unit consistent throughout.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, and the response is generally understandable. However, control is inconsistent, particularly in verb forms and sentence construction. For example, “There are 15% of people worked” combines incompatible structures; “this number increased significantly in 1980 and goes to 20%” shifts tense; and “numbers are goes up” uses an incorrect verb pattern. “In agriculture, the numbers remain same” also needs an article and consistent past tense. Since the chart describes past data, use past forms consistently, such as “employment rose to” and “the figure remained the same.” Practise building accurate complex sentences with one clear subject and correctly matched verbs.

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