Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The given illustration highlights the number of employments in four feilds of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.During the first year the most of the development was in the sector of production unit which gradually increased in 1980 to 20 millions. But in 2020 the downfall came and the manufacturing jobs decreased.In comparision to other sectors this feild remain on the top with more job opportunities.

The next comes retail and agriculture. These both sector remain in between of other two. In 2020, the retail employments increased steadily.While the employments in agriculture sector dropped. People intrest in agriculture became less day by day.

Last one is health care sector which was not having more occupation earlier but later this feild became the most vulnerable. more people started taking intrest in this profession.

in comparision to all four the most sucessfull feild with highest 20 million jobs was manufacturing in 1980. And the least was health care with less than 5 million jobs in 1960.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the four sectors and mention several broad trends, including manufacturing’s rise to a peak in 1980 and agriculture’s decline. However, the account only partially reports the graph: it gives few accurate comparisons across the full period, and some claims are misleading. Manufacturing was not the leading sector in 2020; retail and healthcare were both at about 16 million, compared with manufacturing at 13 million. Healthcare did not become “the most vulnerable”; it rose substantially and tied with retail for the highest figure in 2020. The overview is also unclear, and the statement that manufacturing had the most jobs overall overlooks its later decline. Focus on the main changes and compare the endpoints accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has some paragraphing and a basic sequence, moving from manufacturing to retail and agriculture, then healthcare. Linking phrases such as “The next comes” and “Last one” show an attempt to guide the reader. However, the overall progression is not consistently clear: the final paragraph repeats the manufacturing peak and healthcare’s low starting point rather than drawing the trends together. Connections between ideas are sometimes abrupt, as in “While the employments in agriculture sector dropped,” and the comparison “these both sector remain in between of other two” is difficult to follow. Organise the report around an overview followed by clear trend groups, and use precise references to show how each sector compares over time.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “manufacturing,” “retail,” “agriculture,” “increased,” and “decreased,” so the main subject is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate for describing a graph. “Number of employments” and “job opportunities” do not precisely describe the figures, while “most vulnerable” is unsuitable for a sector whose employment rose. Repetition of “field” and “interest” also reduces precision. Spelling errors such as “feild,” “comparision,” “intrest,” and “sucessfull” are noticeable. Build a more accurate set of trend expressions and use standard spellings; this will make the comparisons clearer and more appropriate to an academic report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences and use past-tense verbs to describe changes, but the range of sentence structures is limited and errors occur frequently. Examples include “These both sector remain” and “the most of the development was,” where sentence structure and agreement are faulty. Articles and plural forms are also often missing or incorrect, as in “in agriculture sector” and “more job opportunities.” Several sentences begin with fragments or incomplete links, including “While the employments in agriculture sector dropped.” Punctuation and spacing are inconsistent, with missing spaces after full stops and a lower-case “in” starting a new sentence. Use complete subject–verb sentences and check agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries.

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