Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the United States between 1960 to 2020. The four sectors of jobs are: manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare.

In 1960, about 15 millions jobs are in the sector of manufacturing. Moreover, in 1980, there is an increment of 5 million job in that sector. Then the number of jobs in manufacturing faces a huge decline because the number of jobs are decreased to 13 million in 2020.

We can clearly witness the rose in number of jobs in the sector of retail and healthcare. In 1960, there are 6 million and 2 million jobs in retail and healthcare sector respectively. Then in 2020, both sectors consist 15.5 million jobs.

Whereas, agriculture sector faces decline over the years. In 1960, there are 6 million jobs, then it decreases to 3 million jobs in 1980 and still at 3 million in 2000. Then it faces another decline, the number of jobs decreased to 2 million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You cover all four sectors and report several key movements accurately: manufacturing rises to about 20 million in 1980 before falling to 13 million, while agriculture declines from 6 to 2 million. However, the overview is not sufficiently clear: the response does not identify that manufacturing is initially the largest sector, or that retail and healthcare both reach about 16 million by 2020 and become joint leaders. The statement that both sectors have 15.5 million jobs in 2020 is close to the chart, but their convergence is an important comparison that could be highlighted more clearly. Add a concise overview of the main contrasts and describe the retail and healthcare trends at the intermediate dates to make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response is arranged in a generally understandable order: an introduction is followed by separate discussion of manufacturing, retail and healthcare, and agriculture. Time markers such as “In 1960,” “in 1980,” and “Then” help readers follow changes. However, the organisation is somewhat mechanical, and the opening does not provide an overview to guide the reader through the main patterns. The retail and healthcare paragraph jumps from their starting figures directly to 2020, leaving the progression less developed than the other sectors. Some linking is also awkward, particularly “Whereas” at the start of the final paragraph, where it does not clearly connect to a contrasting clause. Grouping related trends and using clearer transitions would improve progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing data, including “decline,” “increased,” and “decreases,” and the sector names are clear. The range is adequate for the task, but several choices are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision. For example, “an increment of 5 million job” is an awkward way to describe the rise, and “witness the rose” uses the wrong form of the word. “Both sectors consist 15.5 million jobs” is also an unsuitable collocation for reporting figures. Aim for standard chart language such as “rose by,” “the number of jobs stood at,” and “reached.” Varying these expressions while keeping them accurate would make the report more fluent and precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You communicate the main figures using a mixture of simple statements and some longer sentences, and the overall meaning is usually clear. However, errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and plurals recur. For example, “15 millions jobs are” should use a singular unit and a past-tense reporting verb; “the number of jobs are decreased” has incorrect agreement and verb construction; and “both sectors consist 15.5 million jobs” lacks a suitable grammatical pattern. The opening phrase “between 1960 to 2020” also uses an incorrect preposition pattern. Practise forming accurate past-tense comparisons and checking subject–verb agreement, then use a few controlled complex sentences to show a wider range without sacrificing accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.