Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The chart below illustrate the information about the number of opportunities in four different sectors in the United States of America for 60 years from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the number of jobs in the healthcare sector increased continuously throughout the time period, while that for the agriculture decreased simultaneously.

On one hand, the number of positions in the medical industry were 2 in 1960 and increased up to 5 after 20 years. In 2000 and 2020, this number was doubled and tripled respectively, which was finally reached to 15. While those for the retail sector, looks like the same. In 1960, there were 5 positions which was doubled in 1980 and tripled in 2000, while it remain constant in the last 20 years.

On the other hand, the employment opportunities were decreased in agriculture sector from 5 to 2 in these 60 years. Also, in the manufacturing sector, the figure were first increased from 15 to 20 in the first 2 decades, and then decreased up to 12 in the last 4 decades.

In conclusion, the total jobs were increased in the health services, while those for agriculture decreased throughout the 6 decades.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad contrast between rising healthcare employment and falling agriculture employment, and you also report the main manufacturing pattern. However, some figures and comparisons are inaccurate: healthcare reaches about 11 million in 2000 and 16 million in 2020, not a doubled and tripled figure ending at 15; retail rises from about 6 to 10 to 15, then 16, rather than remaining constant after 2000. Agriculture falls from about 6 to 2, and manufacturing ends near 13. The overview is relevant but incomplete because it misses the important convergence of retail and healthcare at around 16 million in 2020. Select the key trends accurately and compare the sectors directly to make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, two detail paragraphs and a concluding sentence. The contrastive phrases “On one hand” and “On the other hand” help group the sectors, and the reader can generally follow the intended comparisons. However, progression is weakened by unclear links, particularly “While those for the retail sector, looks like the same,” which does not clearly explain what is being compared. The conclusion also repeats the overview rather than adding a useful final comparison. Some sequencing is awkward, and the repeated “while” constructions make the connections feel mechanical. Organise the details by clear trend groups and use precise references to connect each figure to its sector.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of topic-related terms, including “employment opportunities,” “positions,” “sector” and “increased,” so the subject is clear. However, several choices are imprecise or unnatural for describing a graph. “Opportunities” and “positions” are less suitable than “jobs” or “employment,” while “medical industry” is not the chart’s label and could be confused with healthcare more broadly. Phrases such as “looks like the same” and “reached to 15” are awkward, and “the total jobs” suggests a combined total that the chart does not provide. Aim for accurate, consistent labels and standard trend collocations, such as “rose to,” “declined to” and “remained broadly stable.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple and more complex sentences, including clauses linked with “while” and time expressions such as “after 20 years.” However, errors in agreement, verb forms and sentence construction are frequent enough to make some statements difficult to process. For example, “The chart below illustrate” needs subject–verb agreement, and “the number of positions … were 2” has a singular subject followed by a plural verb. “It was doubled and tripled” is also an unclear construction, while “the figure were first increased” combines incorrect agreement with an awkward passive form. Review agreement with singular subjects such as “number” and “figure,” and practise describing changes with direct past-tense verbs: “rose,” “fell” and “remained.”

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