Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph compares the number of jobs in four sectors or US economy Manufacturing,Retail,Agriculture,and Healthcare between 1960 and 2020.

Overall,Manufacturing was the largest employer in 1960 but declined after 1980, while Healthcare and retail showed significant growth.Agriculture saw a continuous fall, become the smallest sectoes by 2020. By the end of the period healyhcare and retail overtook Manufacturing.

In 1960,manufacturing emploed 15 million people, the highest any sectors. The figure peak at nearly 20 million in 1980 before decreasing to 16 million in 2000 and 12 million in 2020. Agritural started with 6 milloin jobs in 1960 but dropped sharply 2.5 million 1980 and continued to fall slight around 1 milloin in 2020, remaing the smallest sector throughout most of the period.

In contrast, Retail and healthcare both grew. Retail began with 6 million jobs in 1960, rising 9 million in 1980 and 14 million in 2000, ending at 15 millionin 2020. Matching retail as the largest employer by the end of the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You provide a relevant overview, identifying manufacturing as the leading sector initially, its decline after 1980, growth in healthcare and retail, and agriculture’s fall. Most reported figures follow the graph, including manufacturing’s peak at about 20 million and retail’s rise. However, some details are inaccurate: manufacturing is shown at about 17 million in 2000 and 13 million in 2020, rather than 16 and 12; agriculture is about 3 million in both 1980 and 2000, then 2 million in 2020. Healthcare’s figures and its strong rise are not described, despite being central to the final comparison. Also, agriculture was not the smallest throughout most of the period, as it began level with retail. Covering healthcare’s stages and checking these comparisons would make the report more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs describing the declining and rising sectors. The contrast marker “In contrast” helps signal the shift to retail and healthcare, and the information generally progresses from the start of the period to its end. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent arrangement and shows some stronger control. However, the final paragraph introduces healthcare but gives no figures or trend for it, then ends with the fragment “Matching retail as the largest employer by the end of the period.” This weakens the progression and leaves the comparison incomplete. Some punctuation spacing also makes the text less easy to follow. Develop the healthcare account and connect the final comparison in a complete sentence.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “largest employer,” “declined,” “significant growth,” “dropped sharply,” and “overtook.” These choices communicate the main trends and show an attempt to vary wording rather than repeat “increased” and “decreased.” However, spelling errors such as “emploed,” “Agritural,” “milloin,” and “healyhcare” are noticeable, and some word choices or forms are inaccurate, including “sectoes” and “Matching retail.” These slips do not prevent the reader from understanding the report, but they reduce precision and control. Check spelling carefully and use standard collocations for describing data, such as “the figure peaked at” and “rose to,” to make the account more natural and exact.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex structures, including the overview contrast “while Healthcare and retail showed significant growth” and the sentence beginning “In contrast.” The main trends are usually understandable, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “the figure peak” needs a past-tense verb, and “dropped sharply 2.5 million” is missing a grammatical link such as “to.” The final sentence, “Matching retail as the largest employer by the end of the period,” is a fragment rather than a complete sentence. There are also missing spaces after punctuation and inconsistent sentence boundaries. These issues fit a response with some errors that rarely block meaning; improving verb forms, prepositions in data descriptions, and complete sentence construction would strengthen accuracy.

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