Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph presents information about the number of four sectors of the economy in the United States from 1960 to 2020. Overall, The two factors Retail and Healthcare rapidly increases throughout the period whereas Manufacturing and Agriculture sectors declind.
Regarding this sectors, Healthcare sector sharply increases from approximately 2million to nearly 15million throughout the period. Retail sector goes steply upward from 1960 to 2000 and reach at 15 million. From 2000 it slightly increases onwards and reached as same as Healthcare sector of the economy in the US.
The Manufacturing sector inclinded from 15million to 20 million between 1960 and 1980. Nevertheless, Manufacturing got downwards throughout the period at the number of 15 million to nearly 12 million. Agriculture
sector started at nearly at 6 million and declined with around 3 milliom from 1960 to 1980. From 1980, Agriculture sector fluctuated throughout the period and reach at around 2 million.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You identify the broad contrast between rising employment in retail and healthcare and falling agricultural employment, and you include several relevant figures. However, the overview is not fully accurate: manufacturing first rises from 15 million to 20 million before declining, so it does not simply decline across the period. The healthcare figure at the end is closer to 16 million, and retail and healthcare are equal at about 16 million in 2020. Some details are also unclear, such as saying manufacturing “got downwards” to 15 million and then nearly 12 million, which does not clearly report the 2000 and 2020 values. A more precise overview and clearer comparisons between all four sectors would make the response more complete.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a basic structure, with an introduction and overview followed by paragraphs describing the sectors. Grouping healthcare and retail together, then manufacturing and agriculture, is a sensible way to organise the information. However, progression within the paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow, particularly in the manufacturing account, where the figures and time periods are not clearly linked. Connectors such as “Nevertheless” do not express the relationship accurately, and “From 2000” is followed by an unclear reference to the endpoint. Some references, including “this sectors,” also make the links between ideas less clear. Use a consistent chronological sequence and explicit time markers to improve the flow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “increases,” “declined,” “approximately,” and “throughout the period,” so the main trends can generally be understood. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “goes steply upward,” “reach at,” and “got downwards.” There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “declind,” “inclinded,” and “milliom,” which reduce the precision of the report. Aim for standard trend language and accurate forms: for example, say that a figure “rose steadily,” “reached 15 million,” or “fell to around 13 million.” This would make the descriptions more natural and easier to interpret.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, grammatical errors occur frequently and sometimes make relationships between figures unclear. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “Retail and Healthcare rapidly increases” and “Retail sector … reach”; use plural agreement for the two sectors and a past-tense verb for the historical data. Articles and number forms also need attention in phrases such as “Regarding this sectors” and “2million.” The sentence beginning “The Manufacturing sector inclinded from 15million to 20 million” uses a verb that conflicts with the increase shown, while the following sentence does not clearly connect its figures to the relevant years. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and simpler sentence patterns before adding complexity.
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