Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line chart illustrates, the number of four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, retail and healthcare both jobs have be grow up risingin this charts, while manufacturing was initially increased , after that declined rate. Agriculture was lowest jpbs in Us.

In 1960, retail initially job around 6 in job millions, after that sharply inclined rate two decades, at 15 job in millions. From 2000 to 2020 was slightly diffences in this sector, at 2 millions. Healthcare sector was more common sector of economy, Heathcare sector was begin with 2 million, Moreover, this sector gradually rosen in job. From 1980 to 2000 that era was largest proliferation rate of job informations, accounted by 13 million, then continuosly increased rate during 2020. which rate was around by 15 million. The healthcare and retail both sector were similarly rate in 2020.

Maufacturing was increased rate of job, at 15 million. after that highest peak of this line chart, at 20 million. However, after that gradually declined rate accounted by 8 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main broad patterns: retail and healthcare rise, agriculture remains the smallest sector, and manufacturing peaks before declining. You also include several relevant figures, such as manufacturing reaching 20 million in 1980 and healthcare starting at 2 million. However, some key details are inaccurate or unclear: retail rises to about 15 million by 2000 and 16 million in 2020, not 2 million; manufacturing ends at about 13 million, not 8 million. The overview also says healthcare and retail are similar in 2020, which is accurate, but calls healthcare “more common” without explaining the trend clearly. More accurate comparisons and a concise overview of the main changes would make the report more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic overall structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details about retail and healthcare, then manufacturing. This gives the reader some sense of how the information is organised. However, progression within paragraphs is often difficult to follow because links are awkward or unclear, as in “From 1980 to 2000 that era was largest proliferation rate” and “which rate was around by 15 million.” The agriculture trend is mentioned only in the overview and is not developed in the details. Some connectors, including “Moreover” and “However,” do not clearly show the relationship between ideas. Grouping the sectors by contrasting trends and using clearer references would improve the flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of vocabulary related to change, including “sharply,” “gradually,” “declined,” and “peak,” and the reader can generally identify the sectors and trends being discussed. However, many choices are inaccurate or unnatural, which sometimes makes the intended meaning difficult to understand. Examples include “jobs have be grow up,” “inclined rate,” “largest proliferation rate,” and “more common sector.” There are also spelling errors such as “Maufacturing,” “Heathcare,” and “continuosly.” Use standard chart language and check spelling: for example, describe figures as “the number of jobs,” and say that a sector “rose” or “increased” to a stated level. This would make the vocabulary more precise and reliable.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including clauses linked with “while,” “after that,” and “However.” Nevertheless, errors are frequent, and several sentences are difficult to interpret. Examples include “retail and healthcare both jobs have be grow up risingin,” “From 2000 to 2020 was slightly diffences,” and “which rate was around by 15 million.” Verb forms, sentence construction, articles, and punctuation are often inaccurate; for instance, “manufacturing was increased rate” does not form a clear grammatical clause. Aim first for accurate sentences with a subject and verb, such as “Retail employment rose to about 15 million in 2000.” Then add more complex comparisons while maintaining correct tense and punctuation.

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