Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in millions in four sectors of the economy i.e Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare in the US between 1960 and 2020. Overall, at the start of 1960 Manufacturing sector had the highest number of jobs i.e 15 million while the Healthcare has the lowest number of jobs i.e about 2.5 million.

Starting from 1960, Manufacturing sector saw a surge till 1980 and then slowly decline till 2020. Talking about other sectors, Retail and Agriculture sectors were at the same level in 1960 but Retail agriculture saw a surge till 2000 a slow decline till 2020 while on the otherhand Agriculture sector saw a decline till 1980 mantaining a steady pace till 2000 and then a slow decline till 2020.

So it can be concluded from the graph that three sectors Manufacturing, Retail and Healthcare saw a surge in jobs from 1960 to 2020 while only sector i.e Agriculture sector saw decline in jobs from 1960 to 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main starting point accurately: manufacturing is highest at about 15 million in 1960, while healthcare is lowest at roughly 2 million. You also capture the broad rise in manufacturing to 1980 followed by decline, and agriculture’s overall fall. However, the overview is incomplete and some key comparisons are unclear or inaccurate. Retail rises throughout, rather than declining after 2000, and healthcare also rises strongly to about 16 million, tying with retail by 2020. The statement that retail and agriculture were at the same level in 1960 is correct, but the later trends need clearer figures and comparison. To develop the report, summarise the endpoint rankings and the major crossover, and support each sector’s trend with selected values.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph describing trends, followed by a concluding summary. This gives the reader a general route through the information. However, the progression is weakened by placing several sectors and time periods in one long sentence, especially the sentence beginning “Talking about other sectors”. Its description of retail and agriculture becomes difficult to follow, and “So it can be concluded” repeats the overview rather than adding a useful comparison. Use separate, clearly focused sentences or paragraphs for the rising sectors and agriculture, and connect them with precise contrasts such as “whereas” or “by contrast”. This would make the relationships between trends easier to track.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “surge”, “decline”, “steady” and “sector”, and the meaning is generally understandable. Some choices are repeated or imprecise, however: “saw a surge” is used for several different patterns, including gradual increases, and “Retail agriculture saw a surge” makes the intended subject unclear. There are also spelling and form issues such as “otherhand” and “mantaining”, which reduce accuracy. Aim for more precise trend language and collocations, for example “rose steadily”, “peaked at”, “fell gradually” and “remained stable”. Check spelling and use the sector names consistently so that comparisons are unambiguous.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, and the main message is usually clear. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with articles, agreement and sentence construction. For example, “the Healthcare has the lowest number” needs a more natural article pattern, while “Manufacturing sector had” would be clearer as “the manufacturing sector had”. The long sentence beginning “Talking about other sectors” contains a faulty connection between the retail and agriculture clauses, making the meaning hard to parse. Capitalisation of sector names is also inconsistent, and punctuation around “i.e.” is awkward. Use shorter clauses when comparing several trends, and check articles and subject–verb agreement during revision.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.