Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line chart illustrates the employment figures across four sectors in the United States economy from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the employment rate in the manufacturing and healthcare sector decreased over the six decades, while the figures for retail and agricultural sector rose significantly.

The manufacturing sector had the highest number of jobs in the US, despite the decline from about 15 million to approximately 13 million in 2020. Whereas, in 1960, the agriculture sector stood just above 5 million and then fell to around 3 million before reaching 2 million by the end of the period.

In contrast, the employment rate in the retail and healthcare sector dramatically increased from nearly 2 and over 5 million to just over 15 million in 2020. However, in the beginning of the period, the retail and agriculture sector were at the same level, whilst in 2020, retail and healthcare met at the same point and agriculture steadily declined.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response4.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource6.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response identifies the chart’s subject and includes an overview, but the overview contains a major factual error: manufacturing and healthcare did not both decline, and agriculture did not rise. Healthcare climbed from about 2 million to 16 million, while agriculture fell from 6 million to 2 million. Several comparisons are also inaccurate or incomplete. Manufacturing peaked at around 20 million in 1980 before declining, rather than simply falling from 15 million to 13 million; retail rose from 6 million to 16 million, not from nearly 2 million. The final comparison that retail and healthcare met in 2020 is accurate, but the main trends and key stages need to be reported reliably. Prioritise an accurate overview and select figures that support it.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs. Linking expressions such as “Overall,” “In contrast” and “However” help signal relationships, and the reader can follow the broad sequence. However, progression is weakened because the overview gives incorrect trends, and the detail paragraphs group sectors without consistently comparing their changes across the period. “Whereas” begins a sentence fragment-like contrast, while “However” introduces a comparison that is not really contradictory. Organise the details around clear patterns—for example, the sectors that rose versus those that fell—and use connectors only where the relationship is logical. This would make the progression more consistent and the comparisons easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

There is an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “employment figures,” “decline,” “dramatically increased” and “steadily declined.” These choices allow the writer to describe movement and comparison, and the meaning is generally clear. Some wording is imprecise or repetitive: “employment rate” is not the same as the number of jobs shown, and “stood just above 5 million” is less accurate than a direct estimate of about 6 million. “Met at the same point” communicates equality, though “were equal” or “converged” would be more natural in this context. The response shows some range, but greater precision in describing quantities and trends—and more accurate use of sector terminology—would strengthen lexical control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

The response uses a mix of simple and more complex forms, including the time clause “before reaching 2 million” and the contrast structure “while the figures for…” Communication is generally clear, and several sentences are controlled. Some grammatical issues remain. “Whereas, in 1960…” is not well formed as a standalone sentence after the preceding full stop; connect it to the previous clause or remove “Whereas.” In “the retail and agriculture sector were,” the plural verb conflicts with the singular “sector,” and the sector names should be treated consistently as separate categories. The opening overview also uses singular “sector” after two sectors. Review sentence boundaries, agreement and article/plural patterns to make the complex structures more consistently accurate.

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