Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The graph illustrates the number of employees in four sectors of the economy in the US over the period of 60 years, between 1960 and 2020.
Overall the graph represents a dramatic rise in the number of jobs in Healthcare along with a noticable surge in Retail Industry also while a decreasing trend is seen in Manufacturing and Agriculture.
In 1960, Manufacturing Industry held the maximum number of employment oppurturinities nearly 15 million jobs which is more than the combined of rest of the three industries. Number of jobs in healthcare was least in the year 1960 but it increased continuously over the period of 60 years and now holds as much employs as Retail Industry does, approximately 15 million.
On the other hand there is a noticable decrease in Agriculture and Manufacturing. Agriculture have the least number of jobs compared to other three Industries , nearly 2.5 million , it signifies the fall in labour intensive practices and a increase in modern Agricultural practices.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You identify the main broad patterns: healthcare and retail rise, while manufacturing and agriculture decline overall. You also report manufacturing at about 15 million in 1960 and note that healthcare and retail reach similar levels by 2020. However, some key comparisons are incomplete or inaccurate: manufacturing peaks at 20 million in 1980 before falling, and retail rises steadily to about 16 million; neither pattern is clearly described. The overview also says manufacturing decreases, without acknowledging its initial rise. The claim that agriculture’s decline signifies changes in farming practices is not shown by the graph, so avoid adding explanations unsupported by the data. A fuller account of the turning points and end values would make the summary more complete.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a clear overall shape, moving from an introduction and overview to details about the starting point and later trends. Paragraphing helps distinguish the overview from supporting information, and phrases such as “Overall” and “On the other hand” guide the reader. However, the final paragraph focuses on agriculture and manufacturing but leaves the retail trend largely unreported, so the progression across all four series is uneven. Some linking is also mechanical: “On the other hand” suggests a contrast, but the sentence mainly continues the description of declining sectors. Organise the details by comparing related trends and use references such as “this figure” or “the sector” clearly to improve flow.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use a reasonable range of task-related vocabulary, including “dramatic rise,” “decreasing trend,” “combined,” and “approximately,” and the meaning is generally clear. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “employment opportunities.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward: “holds as much employs” does not express the comparison naturally, and “the combined of rest” is unclear. Spelling errors such as “noticable” and “oppurturinities” also reduce accuracy. Prefer precise chart language and check spelling carefully; for example, describe a sector as having a certain number of jobs rather than saying it “holds” employees.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
You use both simple and more complex sentence forms, including the contrast in “while a decreasing trend is seen” and the clause “which is more than the combined…”. Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors affect clarity. For example, “Agriculture have” needs subject–verb agreement, while “as much employs as Retail Industry does” has an incorrect comparison structure. The sentence beginning “In 1960” also becomes difficult to follow because its comparison is not formed clearly. Work on agreement, articles, and comparative structures, and divide longer sentences when needed. More consistently accurate complex sentences would make the relationships between the figures easier to understand.
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