Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the number of employment in four sectors in the economy of United States of America between 1960 and 2020.

Overall , manufacturing experienced a decline after reaching its peak in 1980 , while retail and healthcare showed upward trends .In contrast , agriculture employment decreased significantly throughout the period .

In 1960 , manufacturing had approximately 15 million jobs , making its largest sector . the figure is nearly 20 million in 1980 by falling to around 16 million in 2000 and 12 million in 2020.

Similarly , retail employment rose steadily from 6 million in 1960 to 10 million in 1980. and it then increased to approximately 14 million in 2000 and reached 15 million by 2020.

Healthcare jobs also grew considerably , rising from around 2 million in 1960 to 5 million in 1980, before climbing to 15 million in 2020. By contrast , agriculture domain drop from 6 million to 3 million in 1980 about to 2 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main patterns accurately: manufacturing peaks in 1980 and then declines, retail and healthcare rise, and agriculture falls. The overview is clear, and the manufacturing and retail figures are generally close to the chart. This meets the task well, with some features reported more fully than others. However, the healthcare account omits its 2000 value of about 11 million and does not make clear that it reaches roughly 16 million by 2020, tying with retail. Agriculture’s decline is described, but the 2000 plateau at around 3 million is missing. Include these intermediate stages and the final comparison to make the coverage more complete and precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a sensible overall structure: an introduction, a summary of the main trends, and details about the four sectors. Grouping manufacturing and retail before healthcare and agriculture also helps the reader follow the comparisons. However, some connections are awkward or mechanical. For example, “Similarly” introduces retail after manufacturing even though their trends differ, and “and it then” begins a sentence with an unnecessary conjunction. The overview and detail paragraphs are separated, but the final paragraph combines two contrasting sectors without a clear transition between their figures. Use linking expressions that reflect the actual relationship, and make each sentence’s connection to the previous one clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “experienced a decline,” “peak,” “rose steadily,” and “climbing,” which communicates the main trends. There are also attempts at varied phrasing rather than relying only on “increased” and “decreased.” Some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, however: “number of employment” is not idiomatic, “agriculture domain” is unsuitable here, and “making its largest sector” does not clearly express that manufacturing had the most jobs. “Decreased significantly” may also overstate agriculture’s fall. Choose standard terms such as “number of jobs,” “agricultural employment,” and “the largest sector by employment,” and use trend vocabulary precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex structures, including “while” and “before climbing,” and the overall meaning is usually clear. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly in sentence construction and verb forms. In “the figure is nearly 20 million in 1980 by falling,” the tense and relationship between the actions are faulty; use “rose to nearly 20 million in 1980 before falling.” The sentence beginning “and it then increased” is incorrectly punctuated as a new sentence, and “agriculture domain drop” lacks the required past-tense verb form. There are also inconsistent spaces around punctuation and sentence openings. Check tense consistency when describing past data, and proofread sentence boundaries and verb forms.

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