Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

This line graph illustrates the change in number of jobs in the United States in four sectors in 60 years.

Overall it is clear that in the United States the jobs in health care sector had faced amazing rise over a period of 60 year duration, whereas Jobs in Agriculture sector had Instant fall and didn't rise back.

Jobs in Health care and Retail sector experienced early push in 1960 and after that the jobs didn't fall back, And in 2020 both of these sectors were almost at the same level.On the other hand Jobs in Manufacturing sector also got a hike in 1960, and in 1980 that sector was on top and at the highest level but right after that job sector didn't gone well and consistently fallen down. Jobs in Agriculture was also in trouble from 1960 and in all 60 years that job sector didn't experienced any kind of rise.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main broad patterns: healthcare and retail rise, agriculture declines, and manufacturing peaks before falling. The comparison that healthcare and retail are at a similar level in 2020 is also supported by the graph. However, some descriptions are inaccurate or too general. Healthcare and retail did not both experience an “early push”: retail rose steadily, while healthcare’s strongest growth came after 1980. Agriculture fell from about 6 million to 3 million by 1980, remained level to 2000, then declined slightly; saying it had an “instant fall” misses these stages. Include key figures and clarify that manufacturing was highest in 1980, while retail and healthcare reached about 16 million by 2020. This would make the overview and comparisons more fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction to an overview and then to details, and contrasts such as “On the other hand” help signal comparisons. However, the final paragraph combines several sectors and trends in one long sentence, so the progression becomes difficult to follow. The repeated openings “Jobs in…” and repeated references to sectors also make the account feel list-like rather than smoothly connected. Some linking is mechanical, and punctuation around “level.On the other hand” interrupts the flow. Organise the body into clearer comparisons—for example, rising sectors together and declining sectors together—and use pronouns or concise references where the meaning remains clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “sector,” “rise,” “fall,” and “highest level,” so the main trends are generally understandable. However, several choices are informal, imprecise, or unnatural for describing a graph: “amazing rise,” “early push,” “got a hike,” and “didn’t gone well.” “Instant fall” also overstates the gradual agricultural decline. Repetition of “jobs,” “sector,” and “rise” limits the range, while inconsistent capitalisation of “Jobs” affects presentation. Choose neutral, precise trend language and vary it appropriately—for instance, describe a sector as increasing steadily, peaking, declining, or remaining stable. More accurate collocations would make the report clearer and more suitable for an academic summary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with contrast, but control is uneven, particularly in verb forms and sentence boundaries. Examples include “had faced amazing rise,” “didn’t gone well,” and “didn’t experienced,” where the verb construction is incorrect. The phrase “in all 60 years that job sector didn’t experienced any kind of rise” also has awkward tense and article use. There are punctuation and capitalisation problems, including the missing space after “level.” and the unnecessary capital in “And.” These errors sometimes make the timeline or relationship between ideas harder to process. Practise accurate past-tense forms and build longer comparisons from shorter, correctly punctuated clauses.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.