Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

the line graph depicts the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the us between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the us, [redacted phone]. the retailing jab was slightly increse in [redacted phone]. moreover, healthcare jobs was also slightly increase in this time period. furthermore, agriculture related jobs was decline in 2020.

Firstly, manufacturing related jobs were at their peak and accounted for the highest number of hiers in 1960 is around15,millions.but, after 1960 the manufacturing jobs were slightly decline in 2020 is around 12 millions. furthermore, agriculter related jobs was also decline in [redacted phone] is almost 3 millions.

conversely, the retailing jobs was very lowest in 1960. but, in 2020 they were slightly increase is around 5% to 16% that is highest job was liked by people. moreover, healthcare jobs was also very low in 1960. after 1960, they were also slightly increase in 2020 is around 6% to16%.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the four sectors and report the broad direction of change for retail, healthcare and agriculture. However, the overview is unclear and does not capture the main comparison: manufacturing was highest initially, while retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million by 2020. Several details are inaccurate or confusing: retail was about 6 million in 1960, not the “very lowest” without comparison, and its rise is not a percentage change; healthcare rose from about 2 to 16 million, not 6 to 16. Manufacturing peaked at about 20 million in 1980, which you omit. The response also contains 131 words, below the 150-word minimum; 33 words copied from the prompt were excluded. Select key figures accurately and explain the overall shifts more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic paragraph structure, with an introduction, an attempted overview and two detail paragraphs. You also use linking expressions such as “Firstly” and “conversely” to signal movement between sectors. However, progression is limited: the overview repeats the chart title rather than summarising the main pattern, and the detail paragraphs mix comparisons without a consistent order. Repeated connectors such as “moreover,” “furthermore” and “but” make the links feel mechanical, while some references, including “they,” are not immediately clear. Organise the report around the overall trends—for example, declining manufacturing and agriculture versus rising retail and healthcare—and group related figures together.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “line graph,” “manufacturing,” “agriculture related jobs” and “peak,” so the subject is generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the report difficult to interpret: “number of hiers,” “jobs was slightly increase,” and “highest job was liked by people” do not express the intended data clearly. “5% to 16%” also confuses percentages with numbers of jobs, which should be given in millions. Spelling errors such as “increse” and “agriculter” further reduce precision. Use standard trend language and accurate units, such as “rose from 6 million to 16 million” or “declined steadily.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, and the reader can usually identify which sectors you are discussing. However, the range is limited, and frequent errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence construction make the writing awkward. For example, “the retailing jab was slightly increse” has an incorrect verb form, while “healthcare jobs was also slightly increase” combines incorrect agreement with an incorrect verb pattern. The sentence beginning “manufacturing related jobs were at their peak … in 1960 is around15” also shifts tense and lacks clear punctuation. Practise accurate past-tense reporting: “Manufacturing employment peaked at 20 million in 1980, then fell to 13 million by 2020.”

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