Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the information related to the number of jobs in four category of the Finance in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the Healthcare and Retail sector remained equal at the end of the period with the same number of jobs which is above to 15, while the Agriculture sector experienced the most significant loss . In comparison, the healthcare category rose rapidly, Retail sector also rise quick as compared to others in term of number of Jobs .

In 1990, around 15 million of jobs were provided in the Manufacturing sector making it most highest among all of them at first, but at last it declined slightly and reach at the near about 13 in 2020. The the Retail sector in 1990, there was the number of jobs is near about 7 millions , making it the second having the most number of jobs , nevertheless in 2020 it rise rapidly and reached at the near about 17 millions of jobs.

The Agriculture sector hold near about 7 millions of jobs in 1990, however in 2020 it fell down and reach at the number at near about 3 millions of jobs, making it last as compared to the others. The health care in 1990, was about 3 millions of jobs, yet in 2020 it rose a rapid and reach at the the equal to retail sector.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify several relevant broad patterns, including the rise in healthcare and retail jobs and the decline in agriculture, and you attempt an overview. However, important details are inaccurate or unclear: the chart begins in 1960, not 1990, and manufacturing peaks at about 20 million in 1980 before falling to 13 million, rather than starting at 15 million and declining slightly. Retail and healthcare finish at about 16 million each, while agriculture ends near 2 million. The overview also says agriculture had the greatest loss, although manufacturing’s overall fall is larger. These misreadings and the limited comparison of the four series make the summary only partially complete. Use the actual years and select the main turning points and end values accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs describing the sectors. This gives the reader some organisation, and contrast markers such as “In comparison,” “however,” and “yet” show an attempt to connect ideas. However, the progression is weakened by repeatedly describing each sector from “1990” to “2020,” which does not match the chart’s time points and makes the account difficult to follow. Several sentences are also awkwardly assembled, such as “The the Retail sector in 1990, there was the number of jobs…” and “The health care in 1990, was about…”. Grouping related trends and using clear time references would improve the flow. Avoid repeating the same start-to-end pattern when a direct comparison is clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “sector,” “declined,” “rose,” and “reached,” and the reader can generally identify the intended trends. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, making the description less natural. For example, “four category of the Finance” mislabels the sectors, “most highest” is redundant, and “rose a rapid” is not a correct expression. Repeated use of “near about” and “number of jobs” also limits precision. Choose standard chart language such as “employment,” “stood at,” “increased steadily,” and “fell to,” and use the sector names exactly as shown. More accurate phrasing would make your comparisons clearer and more concise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “while,” “however,” and “yet,” but control is inconsistent. Errors occur frequently in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction. Examples include “Retail sector also rise,” “it declined slightly and reach,” and “the Agriculture sector hold”; these need consistent past-tense forms such as “rose,” “reached,” and “held.” Some sentences lack a clear grammatical structure, particularly “there was the number of jobs is near about 7 millions.” There are also repeated article and plural problems. Practise building accurate comparison sentences with a clear subject and verb, then check tense consistency and agreement. Greater control of these basic patterns would make the longer sentences easier to understand.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.