Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-15
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The given graph offers a comparative overview about the number of employment opportunities across four sectors of the economy of the United State between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, it is clear that healthcare and retail topped the chart. While manufacturing significantly decreased over the period. In contrast, agriculture sector was continuously dropped by the end of the period.
In 1960, manufacturing starting at 15 million and then peaked at 20 million before dropping to about 12 by the end of the period. With regard to retail and agriculture, which initiated at just 6 million and then both showed different trend. Retail rose substantially reaching 15 million in 2000 and then stabalized at just 16 million in 2020. Agriculture decreased to about 3 million in 1980 and then dipped reaching a low of 2million by the end of the period. However, healthcare was its lowest at the start and then went up sharply surpassing manufacturing at 13million and reaching 15 million by 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing rises before declining, retail and healthcare grow, and agriculture falls. The overview also notes healthcare and retail as leading sectors by the end, which captures an important comparison. Most figures are close to the chart, but the final healthcare description is inaccurate: it reaches about 16 million in 2020, not 15 million, and it does not surpass manufacturing at 13 million; the two sectors finish at roughly the same level. The overview’s claim that agriculture “continuously” dropped is also imprecise, since it remains around 3 million from 1980 to 2000 before falling again. To strengthen the response, make the overview more exact and compare the final rankings clearly.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a clear overall structure, moving from an introduction and overview to details about the four sectors. Grouping retail with agriculture and then discussing healthcare gives the reader a workable progression, and phrases such as “With regard to” and “In contrast” help signal relationships. However, the overview is split into short, somewhat disconnected statements, and the transition “However” before healthcare does not express a clear contrast with the preceding information. Some references are also unclear, particularly “which initiated at just 6 million,” where the reader must infer that this refers to retail and agriculture. Use more deliberate paragraphing and connect comparisons directly—for example, contrast the sectors’ end values in one concluding detail.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.5
You use a suitable range of trend vocabulary, including “peaked,” “rose substantially,” “decreased,” “surpassing,” and “stabilized,” so the main changes are generally easy to understand. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “comparative overview” and “by the end of the period.” Some choices are imprecise or unnatural, however: “employment opportunities” is not as exact as “jobs,” “topped the chart” is informal, and “continuously dropped” does not accurately describe agriculture’s plateau. Spelling errors in “stabalized” and the joined form “2million” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, conventional chart language and check spelling; alternatives such as “remained stable” and “declined overall” would better express the data.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including a contrast clause beginning “While manufacturing…” and a longer sentence comparing retail and agriculture. The meaning is usually recoverable, but some sentence forms are incomplete or awkward. “While manufacturing significantly decreased over the period” is a dependent clause presented as a sentence; it should be joined to the preceding sentence or rewritten as a complete statement. “In 1960, manufacturing starting at 15 million” needs a finite verb, such as “started.” There are also issues with articles and number formatting in “agriculture sector” and “2million,” while “healthcare was its lowest” has an unclear grammatical reference. Review complete sentence construction and use consistent past-tense forms when describing the historical data.
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